I’ve enjoyed watching them together. Connor has been so inclusive, rolling me into every memory he recalls as the two brothers reunite over our cross-country trek to Finn. He doesn’t need to, of course, but I appreciate him thinking of me.
What’s more, from a psychological standpoint, I find these brothers shedding their outer layers of steel-reinforced skin and just loving each other absolutely fascinating. It’s new for them, and they’re still working out the kinks, but I adore witnessing the evolution.
I’ve also been in contact with Maeve, and I think she and I will be good friends.
A few days ago, my family was so small, and now it’s grown by so many people that I don’t know what to do with myself.
During the evenings, in our own hotel room, Brody and I make love for hours.
We’re beginning a new life together when only two weeks prior, we’d never even met.
It’s incredible to think that, just a short time ago, I was graduating college and moving to Austin with plans to work in a crisis center and apply to grad school. I had my apartment packed and a new one set up. I was even looking forward to living in another city.
I’d promised myself that I’d make a friend or find a lover. I never spoke that desire out loud, but someone must’ve listened to the voice in my heart.
Because I’ve made a friend and found a lover in Brody.
This still doesn’t feel real, if I’m being honest.
We’re sitting a few miles outside of Chicago, enjoying breakfast at a diner before we get back on the road. In another day or so, I’ll be home in Manhattan, Brody and Connor in tow.
Home.
Such a funny word. I haven’t had a place to call home in a long time.
My coffee’s lukewarm and weak, and I don’t even care.
The server arrives with breakfast platters of eggs, sausage, toast, and hash browns.
With fork and knife in hand, Brody quarters each egg, then slices crosses through the hash browns, proving he’s tactical to the bone.
He even attacks breakfast systematically.
I adore learning all his little quirks.
He forks a piece of egg and a crunchy chunk of hash brown. “Look at us, already eating the same breakfast. We even both ordered our eggs over medium. A couple of old geezers chasing down fifty years of marriage.”
I laugh. “And to think I’ve been trying not to spook you with too many questions about the future. Meanwhile, you just brought up our golden anniversary.”
“A guy can dream.”
He’s such a secret sap.
I love it.
Life’s not a straight line, and this wild ride has only driven that point home.
When I do get my graduate degree and open my own practice, I’ll have a deeper understanding of the process. “Enjoy the journey.” I never knew what that meant. My logical brain only saw goals and considered “the journey” as the training ground.
I always forgot to breathe. To just be in the moment.
I don’t know what I did before Brody, how my lungs ever filled all the way with air. This man taught me to exist in a way I never thought possible.
He’s not the same man that scooped me up on graduation day either.
He’s more relaxed than he was when we first met. With this smoother expression, he appears younger. Happier.
He still sits with his back to the wall and his eyes on the entrances, but he smiles.
