‘Natalie,’ she said after a beat, allowing the change in subject even though it was a little stilted, as if he’d trespassed into one of her no-go zones. ‘My father… I was supposed to be a boy.’
‘Ah.’ Okay, he’d definitely trespassed.
‘Nathaniel. Nat for short.’
She said it with brisk disinterest, like she wasn’t bothered, but Alessandro could spot a fake at ten paces.It took one to know one. Underneath her clipped words he sensed a deeper turmoil. As if maybe she felt inadequate because she wasn’t the boy her father had wanted.
‘My parents had kind of got used to thinking of me as Nat so they decided on Natalie.’
Yep. The slight huskiness to her voice betrayed an emotional minefield. ‘Nathalie.’ Alessandro took his time rolling it around his tongue, giving it an Italian inflection, softening thet, liking the way it sounded. ‘It’s pretty. Much prettier than Nat.’
‘I prefer Nat,’ she dismissed lightly, brushing at imaginary fluff on her skirt.
Alessandro lowered his eyes, watching the nervous gesture. It was preferable to the emotion he could see and hear. Her emotional vulnerability was far too close to his own.
‘Ah, yes, Nat. Nat, Nat, Nat.’ Alessandro lightened his voice, steering them back to neutral ground. ‘I hear that name so often at home these days I’m beginning to think you’ve hypnotised my son.’
She laughed and a well of relief flushed through his system as her eyes sparkled. ‘Julian talks about me?’
Despite not wanting to, Alessandro noticed the way her uniform pulled across her chest. The way the zipper tab nestled in her cleavage. It had been such a long time since he’d noticed anything much about a woman at all but it was becoming a habit with this bossy Australian nurse.
He sent her a tight smile. ‘Non-stop.’
She grinned. ‘Sorry.’
But she didn’t sound remotely sorry. In fact, she looked damned pleased with herself. Alessandro shrugged. ‘I’m pleased he… has someone.’
Even if hearing her name incessantly meant she was never far from his thoughts. Even if that transferred into the rare moments of sleep he managed to snatch during nights that seemed to last an eternity. Those few precious hours were suddenly full of her. Bizarre erotic snapshots the likes of which he hadn’t experienced since puberty.
Just another reason to despise himself a little bit more. Camilla hadn’t even been dead a year and he was fantasising about some… lookalike-but-not Australian bossy-boots, like a horny teenager.
‘He’s a great kid, Alessandro.’
Her voice had softened and he could tell she held genuine affection for Julian. He wished his own relationship with his son was as uncomplicated. When he looked at Julian he saw Camilla and his guilt ratcheted up another notch. ‘I know.’
And he did know. But he didn’t know how to reach a child who was a stranger to him. He didn’t know how to look at his son, love his son and pretend that he wasn’t the reason Julian’s world had been torn apart.
Perhaps if they’d been closer before Camilla had died…
They looked at each other for a long moment, the air thick between them and not just from stuffiness. A phone ringing broke the compelling eye contact and it took a few seconds for him to realise it wasn’t the lift emergency phone but Nat’s mobile.
She pulled it out of her pocket and gave an inward groan at the name flashing on the screen. ‘Perfect,’ she muttered as she tapped the answer button.
It was difficult for Alessandro not to eavesdrop. It was impossible to even pretend he wasn’t. There was him and herin a tiny metal box, not much light and nothing else to do. He did try to feign disinterest, pulling his phone out and checking his emails, but it was obvious she was having problems with her lease.
When she pushed the end button on her phone with a grimace, Alessandro said, ‘Problema?’
She stuffed the phone back in her pocket. ‘You could say that.’
‘Landlord issues?’
‘That’s an understatement.’ She gave a deep sigh. ‘I’ve been given two weeks to move out.’
Alessandro dropped both of his legs, stretching them out in front as he crossed his arms across his chest. ‘Because you have lots of loud parties and are behind on your rent?’
She flicked him a quelling look. ‘The owners want to move back in.’
‘Can they do that?’
