“Joke all you want,” Tarzan said. “Your time will come one day. And then I'll laugh at you while you’re drowning in diapers.”
I shook my head.
“Yeah, right. I’ve never even been close to popping the question, let alone tying the knot. Judging by my track record, I’ll be a bachelor for the rest of my days.”
Tarzan didn’t say anything, but his gaze lingered on me for a split second too long. I tried not to squirm under his scrutiny. If anyone could see through the pretense of my bravado and bullshit, it was him.
To be honest, I was jealous of the love that Tarzan and Keely had for each other. I knew what a bad marriage looked like thanks to my parents, and I had no desire to put anyone else through that. It was comforting to keep my relationships short and sweet, before they could turn sour.
But deep down, buried under layers of self protection, there was an ache of yearning. I didn’t want to follow in my parents’ footsteps. I wanted to do better than them. I wanted the opposite of what they had—laughter, joy, a tranquil home, and the thrill of waking up beside the love of my life every single day.
The problem was I didn’t believe something like that was meant for me.
Tarzan had a wife and family because he was a strong, steady guy. It made sense that someone like him would be married, raising a herd of kids. He was made for it.
But I was nothing like him. I already had one foot out the door as soon as I said hello on the first date.Happily ever afterdidn’t happen for someone like me because I didn’t stick around long enough to see it through. I'd managed to reach my early thirties without having a relationship that lasted longer than a few weeks.
“Kenny,” Tarzan called. “Come here and give your Uncle Teddy a hug.”
Kenny hurried over and flung his little arms around my leg. A soft smile touched my lips as I combed my fingers through his wispy golden hair.
I never really thought about wanting kids of my own before. But babysitting Kenny changed my mind in an instant. He experienced the world with so much joy and curiosity. And when he fell asleep against my chest for the first time, I was honored that such a fragile, vulnerable being would trust me enough to do that.
The chances of being a dad myself one day seemed pretty damn slim though.
When Kenny finally began to wind down, I helped him get settled at one of the tables with a box of crayons that Hades kept around for young visitors. I scribbled a smiley face on Kenny’s page in purple. He made a noise of protest and pushed my crayon away with his little hand.
“Your dad makes the same sound when I piss him off, too,” I said.
“I heard that,” Tarzan grumbled from the bar.
“Good. I wasn’t trying to hide it.”
“I can tell,” he replied drily.
Just as I took a breath to continue pestering him, my phone rang.
“Saved by the bell,” I said. “For now.”
Tarzan held up his coffee mug in a toast.
“A brief reprieve from your bullshit. I’ll enjoy it while it lasts.”
I laughed and waved him off as I pulled my phone out. Shea was calling. That was odd. I'd visited Hotline less than an hour ago. What would she be calling me for?
“Did you miss me already?” I asked.
“Hey, baby,” she crooned in an overly saccharin voice that I’d never heard Shea use in her life. “Oh, really? You’re almost here? Well, then I’ll make sure to leave the door unlocked for you. And don’t forget to give me a kiss when you show up. I miss my man and I’m lonely.”
My instincts went on red alert.
What the fuck was going on? Shea didn’t talk like this to me. Ever.
Something wasn’t right.
“Shea,” I said, keeping my tone even to reassure her. “Are you in trouble right now?”
She hummed. A male voice emanated in the background, too indistinct to make out his words.
