I lingered there on the threshold of the living room, feeling something heavy sitting between us.
“Trooper,” I said. “I’ll be okay. You’re here, remember?”
He didn’t respond right away, almost as if he wanted to say something else. Then he nodded and gave me a salute.
“Call me if there’s any trouble, yeah?”
“Always,” I said with a smile.
Practically falling asleep on my feet, I brushed my teeth and changed into a tank top and shorts for bed. Crawling under the covers, I sank into my mattress, expecting to doze off within seconds.
Instead, I drifted in and out of consciousness. When I closed my eyes, I saw that butterfly. Tattered wings. Tucked under my windshield wiper. Blue and black like my hair. Blue and black like the dragonfly tattoos down my spine.
My breathing began to grow faster and faster, matching the increasingly frantic pace of my heartbeat.
Before I realized what I was doing, I gathered my duvet around me and drifted like a ghost through the house, into the living room illuminated by the half-moon at the window.
Trooper was sprawled on the couch, one arm tucked behind his head. He’d kicked off his boots during the first movie, and his cut was hanging on a hook by the door.
Seeing him sleeping so peacefully sent a wave of calm washing over me. I placed a hand on his chest, squeezing onto the couch next to him.
“Theo,” I whispered.
Not Trooper, his road name.
Not Theodore, the name his parents gave him. The name that never really seemed to suit him.
Not Teddy, the name only his big brother pestered him with.
Just Theo. My Theo.
His eyes flew open and his hand settled over mine.
“What is it?” he said, his voice edged with concern. “What’s wrong?”
For so long, I had prided myself on the fact that I didn’t need anyone. But deep down, I was tired of being lonely. My father walked away. My mother jumped from one boyfriend to the next. Even my best friend was busy with her family.
Everyone always had someone else.
And then there was just me. Alone.
“I want to stay with you,” I whispered.
A heartbeat of stillness filled the air. I didn’t dare breathe, waiting for his response. If he cracked a joke, if he laughed in my face or teased me—
Trooper didn’t do any of that.
Without a word, he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, molding our bodies together. He rearranged the duvet around us like a warm, puffy cloud and cupped his palm to the back of my head.
Draped over him like this, I could feel every shift of his muscled body beneath me through our thin layers of clothing.
“Better?” he asked, his breath grazing my temple.
I nodded and lifted my head to look at him. Then I realized just how close we were, how intimate this was, entangled and entwined and twisted together like…
Like lovers.
Trooper cupped his palm to my cheek, brushing his thumb along the line of my lower lip.
