“Surprise me,” I said with a shrug. “Artist’s choice.”
“Brave decision,” Shea replied. She rummaged through her set of markers and held up a pink one. “What if I chose a princess bow? Or a sparkly diamond tiara? Your biker brothers might tease you mercilessly.”
“I would wear it with pride,” I said, holding her gaze. “Because you made it.”
Shea's throat worked as she swallowed and she looked away. Rifling through her markers, she selected her color palette—stormy blue, royal purple, shiny beetle green, and midnight black.
“Last chance to change your mind,” she said. “Are you sure you don’t have any specific requests? Otherwise you’re entirely at my mercy.”
I grinned.
“That’s exactly where I want to be.”
She huffed and shook her head as she started sketching a few lines. The buzz of conversation in the room faded to a dull background noise as I watched Shea. She was beautiful like this, in her element. Completely and utterly engrossed in her work and the design taking shape with every stroke of her marker.
“You’re good with Kenny,” I said after a minute or two. “He might be getting a little crush on you.”
Shea hummed, adding a few scribbles of green.
“He’s a cute kid. I always thought it would be fun to be an aunt, but I never had any siblings. And Lila doesn’t have kids that I can spoil yet.”
“What about you?” I prompted.
She frowned with confusion and glanced up, pinning me with a questioning look from her warm hazel eyes. I swallowed hard under her scrutiny, her closeness, her touch—a heady combination that was making it difficult to think straight.
“Having kids of your own,” I clarified. “You’ve never…mentioned it before.”
“Oh,” Shea said.
And that was it. She bent back to her work, showing no inclination to say anything more.
"Go ahead, call me a dumbass for sticking my foot in my mouth," I said. "I can mind my own business."
Shea arched an eyebrow, amused, as she selected that dark stormy blue.
“I figured out you’re a dumbass a long time ago,” she replied affectionately. “It’s just—I’ve always struggled to envision a future for myself. Getting married, having kids…it doesn’t feel real. I’ve been so lost in life that I just wanted a place that I could call home. And I think part of me is still searching for that.”
Her words hit me like a kick to the gut. When Tarzan and I were kids, our home life had been so turbulent with our parents fighting all the time that we were desperate to be anywhere else.
Then I went into the military, searching for somewhere to belong.
Tarzan didn’t come with me. And we went our separate ways for a few years.
I knew exactly what it was like to feel as if you had been set adrift in the world.
“What about Hotline?” I pointed out. “You worked your ass off to make that dream happen.”
Shea nodded.
“I’m grateful for that, of course. But…now what? Where do I go from here? What’s the next step? Obviously, Raine thinks I need a husband before I’m a wizened crone. But I’ve spent so long on my own that I can’t imagine someone…being thereall the time, you know? My mother got married and clearly that didn’t last.”
A pause settled between us as Shea focused on her work. I tried to get a look at the design but the angle of her head blocked my view. So, I decided to sit back and trust her visionary process.
“You’re worth staying for, Shea,” I said. “Not every man will be an asshole like your dad was.”
Her marker slipped. She swore under her breath and licked her thumb quickly, scrubbing at the errant streak of ink.
“I didn’t say that,” Shea replied firmly.
