Unfortunately, right now I just feel like I am going to puke. It’s been two days since I tried to get him to open up about whatever is bothering him. He hasn’t said a word about it. In fact, he hasn’t even given me a small hint as to why he’s in such a shitty mood. I’m pretty sure it has something to do with me; even if he is pretending it’s about Rafe Shaeffer.
“Rachel is right,” Brynn says as she adds another layer of lipstick. “You seem a bit off tonight. Need me to take over the lead?”
“You don’t know ballet,” Amanda says. The look Brynn shoots her could incinerate her on the spot, sequins, fake hair and all. Fake hair is flammable.
“I’m fine,” I insist, checking myself in the mirror again. But even after fixing my hair and my lashes, my face screams distress. It’s obvious I’m unwell.
“Are you sure you’re feeling all right?” Amanda asks. “You know you can talk to us.”
Amanda is a funny one. She’s a sheep in wolf’s clothing. Her undying loyalty to Brynn is blatant. Although it’s probably because she’s afraid of her and scared to cross her. I wish she were genuine, but I don’t think she is.
I let out a sigh. Whether or not these girls are actually my friends, I am having a hard time holding things in anymore. “Can you girls keep a secret?” I ask, and they swarm around me.
“Of course.”
“Absolutely.”
“Our lips are sealed.”
Trustworthy or not, I’m about to pop.
“It’s just…Dom and I have been fighting,” I start in.
“Oh no,” Amanda says.
“I was wondering,” Rachel adds.
“About what?” Brynn asks.
“That’s the wild part. I don’t even know. Things have been so good. Romantic and hot and fun, and real. We’ve been talking about the wedding and opening Pointe. It’s been so good,” I go on.
“I still can’t believe you’re opening a studio. I’d love to be an instructor. I used to teach jazz to little girls, you know,” Amanda says, but Brynn snaps at her.
“Hush, Mandy. This isn’t about you.”
“So what changed?” Brynn asks me.
“I don’t even know. He’s being cold. Closed off. Like he knows something and doesn’t want to talk about it,” I answer.
“Is there anything you’ve been hiding from him?” Rachel asks. The tone of her question makes me wonder if she’s been talking to Brynn. Brynn seems to know everything. More than Lainey even. God, I miss Lainey.
I bite my lip. “Nothing that I don’t plan on telling him soon,” I say. It’s not an answer, but it’s not a lie either.
“So he still doesn’t know you’re pregnant?” Brynn asks flat out, and all the girls gasp.
“You’re pregnant?” Rachel says, her eyes wild with the thrill of gossip.
“Oh, my god!” Amanda says with a gaping smile.
I look at Brynn, who just kind of half-smirks. “Yes,” I admit. “But no one else knows.”
“When were you planning on telling him?” Rachel asks.
“Why are you hiding it?” Amanda asks. “Oh my god, were you going to surprise him?!”
I sit down on the locker room bench, suddenly not feeling so well. “I was planning on it. I just…couldn’t figure out the right time.”
“I would say the right time is before he finds out on his own,” Rachel says. I nod.
