But it's his brown leather notebook on the nightstand that catches my attention.
The pages are filled with Cameron's messy handwriting. Fragments and random notes that paint a picture of his scattered life:
Flight 447 LAX to Boston - Gate B12 Milo's cousin - good sushi place on 82nd New chord progression - Am, F, C, G? Sophie 212-555-8847 (blonde from after-party)
There are phone numbers with no names, restaurant recommendations, half-finished lyrics that trail off mid-sentence. A doodle that looks like a guitar neck fills one margin.
Edison shifts in the doorway, and I swear those dark doggy eyes are judging me. My cheeks burn with guilt, but I keep reading.
Sterling meeting Tuesday. New contract bullshit. Mrs. B says Posey is afraid of thunderstorms. Tara - early childhood education major. Why teach?
My heart skips a beat at seeing my name in his handwriting. Below it, he's scribbled:Ask about her family? Something sad there.
Edison woofs, as if accusing me of being a snoop.
"Sorry, Edison," I whisper. "I couldn't help myself."
Edison and I make our way back downstairs, my heart still racing from what I'd read.
Cameron had written my name, wondered about my family. It makes something flutter in my chest that I'm not ready to examine.
"Here you are," I say, presenting the guitar to Cameron with unexpected formality.
Edison settles by Cameron's feet, shooting me one last reprimand for snooping.
"What are you going to play?" Posey asks, bouncing slightly in her chair.
"I think I'll play one of my favorites. It's called “You Light Up My World.”
He plays the first few bars, and his voice when he sings differs from his speaking voice—richer, more vulnerable. I study his hands on the strings, remembering how those same hands had written my name in that notebook.
"Daddy Cameron, is that song aboutmelighting up your world?"
"Truth is, I wrote this song before you were born. Knowing that a girl like you was going to come into my world one day. And here you are."
"And you light up my world," Posey says to Cameron as she walks over to wrap her little arms around him. "I like that you're here with me."
He pulls her into a gentle embrace, and I watch his entire demeanor soften. My eyes tear up. I can tell Mrs. Bellows and Mrs. Bixby are also moved.
We all stand there for a moment, slightly uncomfortable witnessing this private bonding between parent and child.
Cameron clears his throat and pulls back, clearly overwhelmed by the unexpected intensity of the moment.
"Well," he says, picking up his guitar again, "do you want to hear the complete song or not?"
"Yes, Daddy Cameron. I want to hear the song."
Cameron strums the guitar and plays "You Light Up My World."
I've heard it before and consider it one of my favorites.
When it's over, we all give him a small round of applause. Sincere applause, with Posey clapping the loudest.
"Now what shall we do today? Go to town?" Cameron asks.
"Yes!" says Posey. "Tara, will you help me get ready?"
We walk upstairs to her room. After I help her wash her face and brush her teeth with her frog-shaped toothbrush, she asks a question I find challenging to answer.
