My eyes whip in his direction, and I freeze, crossing my arms over my chest. His silence is grating on my nerves. “Our security is already compromised, hellbeasts are knocking at our door, and you think the best option is to risk our safety even more. I swear you can be the most careless, fucking selfish?—”
“What would you have me do?” His eyes lock with mine, and for the first time, I note the pain in them. He’s aged over these last few months, turning into someone I hardly recognize, but there’s something familiar about his expression.
Desperation. Agony.Fear.
We might not be able to read each other’s minds like the guitarist twins, but I can read his features. Sebastian Alex, the imposing leader of our self-made metal band, is afraid. Not of our tour ending, not of losing access to our endless supply of human energy. Not even of the hell creatures that seem so determined to find us.
He’s terrified for his pregnant mate and the imminent danger she’s in by carrying a half-demon spawn. Because, even in a best case scenario, there is no hospital we can take her to for delivery. No human doctor for prenatal care, and whatever else mortal women need during pregnancy. It’s too much of a risk. There’s too much at stake.
We’re on our own to figure this out, and the best we can do is prepare for any and all scenarios that mightarise. Even if that means losing Niki or the baby… or both.
“What would you have me do, Kaseilon?” he asks again, a muscle in his jaw twitching. “Because I’m all ears. I’ve searched in every city we’ve visited, looking for any kind of answer, and I’ve come up empty-handed.”
I don’t have any answers for him.
“She needs someone and she trusts Joseline,” he explains. “I know we can’t keep the secret from her forever—or even very long, at the rate things are going—but I’ll face that bridge when we get to it. Right now, my mate is happy, and that is the only thing that matters.” His eyes drop from mine to the floor in front of him. “If she doesn’t make it, if this takes her life…”
His voice trails off, but he doesn’t have to finish the sentence.
If the half-demon baby kills Niki, he wants her to enjoy her last weeks on Earth.
The realization shatters what’s left of my anger. It’s difficult for demons to empathize, but I swear the more time I spend among humans, the more the pesky feeling worms its way through me.
Despite how stupid it is to bring another human into our lives, I can’t say that I blame him. If I ever considered taking a mate, and she was in Niki’s position, I would go to the ends of the Earth to keep her safe. I’d do anything I had to do.
I just hate that the rest of the band might get caught in the crossfire because of it.
My arms drop, and my shoulders sag. I take a fewslow steps back to the couch and sink down next to Sebastian, who’s staring at something unseen on the opposite side of the space.
“I wish I had answers,” I mutter, folding my hands between my knees. “If you say we can trust this woman, I’ll do my best…”
I hate the thought of yet another human discovering the truth, that there are monsters more foul than anything they could ever imagine roaming the Earth. That we are monsters, demons straight from the pits of Hell.
We’ve done so well covering our tracks, keeping our identities anonymous. From the disguises to strict schedules to spending most of our time indoors or on the tour buses. Everything about our rockstar lives has been carefully plotted and constructed.
However, we all know the risk we take by being in the spotlight. Eventually, our charade will shatter, and all the shards will come raining down.
Soon, we will have to answer for our sins; we’ll have to disappear.
I’m not ready—not by a long shot—but my hands are tied. Sebastian, Steele, and Daire sealed their fate, as well as mine, when they decided to take human mates. My days as a drummer are officially numbered.
It’s always been a matter of time. I just hoped we could keep it up a little longer.
“I want to say that everything will be okay,” I start slowly, trying to wrangle my jumbled thoughts. “I want to reassure you, Acherith, but?—”
“I know,” he cuts me off. “But there is no turningback. We’re here now, and we just have to keep going… no matter where the road leads.”
Silence fills the tour bus again, and we sit there. My mind is a tangled web of what if’s, but I know there are no answers. And the longer I dwell on it, the more questions race through my head.
I reach over and place a hand on Sebastian’s shoulder, and my stomach drops. He’s weak. Really weak.
“Seb, how long has it been since you fed?” Without waiting for an answer, I tap into the reservoir of energy in me and drag it to the surface, pushing it down my arm and into Sebastian. It isn’t nearly enough to replenish him, but it’ll be a tiny pick-me-up until he can find another energy source.
“I don't remember.” His color already looks a little better with the tiny energy boost. “But I’ve been funneling so much of it into Niki. The baby is siphoning her energy almost faster than I can keep up, and it’s only getting worse.”
I shake my head. “Well, you’re going to have to feed more often. Between shows, before and after meals, I don’t care.”
He nods in agreement.
