He came to me and laid his hand on my shoulder. “You’re like your mom when it comes to emotional dynamics. You see the pain beneath the anger and upset in others. And when that’s leading the way, it can be very difficult not to give that empathy free reign. But a line needs to be drawn at some point. From what I overheardandwhat I know of Zayn as it is, this should be that point, Winter. You are trapped in the role of his emotional caretaker and it’s unfair, deeply toxic, and clearly painful.”
I swallowed hard as his words cut at me.
“How long… when did you—”
“Just as you were talking. Finishing up.”
Finishing up?Urgh. “Huh.” I shifted my weight, but as he went to pull his hand from my shoulder, I held it there, not wanting it to leave me yet. “I start at Loxley Academy tomorrow, Dad. He’ll be there for another year yet.”
“I’m aware. And we also know he’s one of the reasons you chose that specific academy.”
“We? The whole family knows?”
He nodded.
“It’s also partially about Evira, isn’t it?”
I jolted. “What? Why would it… that’s not—”
He squeezed my hand in his. “When you make a deep sexual connection, it stays with you. You can’t just shake it off.” His lips quirked. “Unlike me. At least, before Lazriel, Velra, and Cassius came along.” He smiled kindly. “Especially when both of them were your firsts—the first woman, then the first man you fucked.”
Fucked.I didn’t like that term associated with Evira. It hadn’t been… sordid like that with her. She’d needed me. She’d needed help. Help that I’d been in a position to offer without any fallout. Well, at least no fallout for her.
“I didn’t know she was starting at Loxley this same year as me when I applied. But even though she is, you know the situation.”
A rumble sounded in his throat. “Yes. The disgust of dragonkind toward the idea of necromancers fornicating with their most treasured beings. Life versus death—from their perspective. They can’t stand the idea of a death-touched being connecting physically with a dragon that exudes life, that they consider the antithesis to death.”
“It’s their nature.”
“And that should just be accepted, not subject to re-evaluation, to evolving?”
“Of course it shouldn’t just be accepted. Nothing that devalues and discounts beings based on their species should be. But when it comes to Evira’s specific situation, itisthe current status quo. I can’t do anything about that. Not withoutendangering her and the position she holds as Crown Heir of the Dracoryn Realm.”
“If you want to do something about it—”
“No, Dad.”
“What?”
“I don’t think your brand of intervention is going to do anyone any favors.”
I could see his urge to push forward with it.
He hated that I was seen in a negative light because of the necromancer aspect.
Well, it was the Wraith part as well, but not to such an extent. Frost and shadow came along with the Wraith aspect, and dragonkind considered it connected to nature and elemental magic. It was… a whole lot of complicated theorizing and stereotyping.
“If you change your mind, I’m here.”
“I know. Thank you.” I grinned out at him then. “And…‘fornicating’?Wow, you really toned that down, Dad.”
He patted my shoulder, then stepped back. “Well, I saw your disgusted reaction when I used the word ‘fucking’.” He eyed me suspiciously. “When it came to Evira. You didn’t seem to have a problem with my use of‘fleshlight’in regard to Zayn.”
“Oh, the disgust was still there. It just… it was accurate in that case. As much as I obviously don’t like being compared to a sex object.”
“It’s what you are to him, Winter.”
“Dad—”
