“You know what. We don’t need to do this, Rick. It was a long time ago. I’ve grown up. I’ve moved on.”
“I see. Well, I’m sorry for all of it.”
His head dropped and he started to walk– right past me.What the fuck?
“Are you serious?”
He stopped, and without turning said, “You said your piece, I said mine.”
Scoffing, I said, “Unbelievable. It’s late. I’m going to bed, but I’ll be leaving in the morning.”
I started to stomp past him, but he grabbed me, pinning me to a pile of hay. “I’m ruined, Sparrow,” he growled as his body pressed against me. His cheek pressed to mine, his breath heavy in my ear. “Broken. I was never the same after I left you. I feel no spark, no happiness, nothing. I don’t speak because I have nothing to say. I’m a hollow shell. All I have is my club. They’re the only reason I’m not a pile of bones in the dirt.”
My heart beat wildly in my chest and my hands pressed to his, but not to push him away. “Rooster–”
His fingers threaded into my hair. “You can’t tell me I didn’t do the right thing, Sparrow. Your life would’ve beenso different if we’d stayed together. But it doesn’t mean I didn’t hate myself for every second of every day since.” His fingers tightened in my hair as he nuzzled into my neck. “But goddammit if my selfish ass doesn’t want you still.”
Pressure filled my face, forcing tears from the corners of my eyes. “I loved you, Rooster. And you just left. You left me sobbing on the floor of my shitty little apartment. And you ignored my calls before you finally blocked me. Youblockedme,” I said on a sob. My body shook as I tried to control the tears, but it was no use.
His hands left my hair and he gathered me into a bear hug, squeezing me so tight I almost couldn’t breathe. But I didn’t want him to let go. It was stupid and made no sense, but I wanted him to hold me closer.
Instead of trying to fight it, I let it out. The years of hurt and frustration. The years we lost. The years of not having this man who made me feel like I could conquer the world, all before he was the one who shattered mine.
“I never stopped loving you, Sparrow,” he whispered in my ear.
That choked me up even more. “Don’t–say–that–”
“It’s true. I’m sorry I hurt you, but I’m not sorry for letting you become the woman you were meant to be.”
I roared deep from my diaphragm and pushed at him. “Fuck you, Rooster. If I was so smart and strong, I could have had it all.” My arms started whipping over and over at him, my fists hitting his chest. “We could have had it all,” I said as I kept hitting him.
He didn’t try to stop me, but he didn’t let me go. Then, my blows became mere taps. Finally, my hands bunched the soft leather of his cut, pulling him even closer as I dug my face into his chest.
“You deserve better than me, Sparrow.”
Mumbling into his chest, I said, “There was nobody better for me than you.” There it was. I finally voiced the words that kept me from having any other relationship since him. Nobody ever stood up to him. Nobody ever made me feel the way he did. And I never wanted anyone as badly as I wanted him. Even now.
A loud voice boomed from the doorway. “Everything alright in here?”
Clearing my throat, I said, “Um, fine. Just hashing out some personal business.”
“You sure, miss?” the man’s voice called.
Wiping at my tears, still caged in his arms, I answered, “Yes. I think if anything you should worry for his safety.”
“Alright. Well, keep it down. Can’t be scaring the animals.”
Cringing, I called out, “Oh, I’m so sorry. Will do, sir.”
Looking up at Rooster with wide eyes, I burst into laughter. He covered my mouth with his hand, smiling.
“The man just said to keep it down.”
After getting myself under control, I pulled his hand away and wiped my cheeks with both hands. “Sorry, but the whole thing was just so…”
“Yeah. I know.”
Blowing a breath through puffed cheeks, I said, “I’m sorry I hit you.”
