Inching closer, he said, “What if I told you I think about you when I’m alone and it’s safe to feel things I shouldn’t for my straight friend? What if I told you I think about what it mightmean to be held by you, not out of comfort or friendship but because you’ve chosen me? Because you want me?”
“I’d tell you it’s recently come to my attention that I might not be quite so straight, and then I’d share that I’ve been doing the same, thinking about you, wanting you, wondering if you want me back.”
“Does that scare you?”
“Only in the way unexplored things sometimes do,” I whispered.
His eyes scanned my face with an intensity that had my thoughts scattering and my nerves skittering. He leaned close, so close we shared breath, the invisible warm stream of his exhales hitting my lips. “What if I kissed you right now, would you stop me?” he asked.
“No. In fact, I’d kiss you back.”
Chapter 25
Oliver
Iclosed the final inch of space, our lips met in an experimental and discovering touch before deepening. Luke’s mouth molded to mine as if it had always been meant to fit there. His palm drifted to the back of my neck, his thumb caressing my jawline as I moved closer, sighing into him.
Every kiss that came before this one was paltry by comparison. This kiss didn’t demand; it invited. It didn’t take; it offered. Trembling with possibility, it held everything I’d ever wanted. Luke kissed in dichotomies—tender yet possessive, gentle yet guiding, sweet yet edged with hunger. It was everything I’d ever hoped for in a kiss.
His other hand circled around my back, fingers tracing up and down my spine. I melted into his touch, into his mouth, into the man who had stood steady in my life from the moment he entered it and who now kissed me as if I were the most precious thing he had ever been allowed to hold.
I could spend a lifetime exploring his mouth, tracing every curve and sigh, but it wasn’t enough. I wanted the wildfire. I wanted to know the sounds he made when he came undone, and I wanted to be the reason he let go.
Shifting my weight, I eased him down onto the couch. He went willingly, an open, trusting surrender, stretching his legsout in front of us. Crawling between them, I settled on top of him.
Our mouths found each other again as his arms came around my back. He opened for me, breath catching as my tongue swept against his. The lingering notes of chai lived in his mouth, a blend of spice and heat and comfort. I became drunk on it. Drunk on him.
Still, I wanted more. More of his mouth. More of his body. More of the tension coiling tighter and tighter in my abdomen until it had nowhere left to go but out.
“Luke . . . can I . . . would it be alright to take this further?”
“Yeah. I’m good. I want more with you, just go slow with me, okay? I’m open right now, but I’m not sure where the line might get drawn.”
“Of course. Let’s use the same color system we use in my self-defense training. Green is ‘I’m all in, no complaints.’ Yellow is ‘slow down, we need to assess what’s happening, I’m not sure I’m okay with it.’ Red means we stop.”
He leaned up to kiss me. “Yeah, okay. My light’s green, Ollie. You can drive through.”
“And if I rub against you like this, that feels alright?” I asked, rolling my hips down into him in a slow test.
His breath caught on a low, startled exhale, like the pleasure surprised him. His fingers tightened at my back. “Yeah,” he murmured, voice low and a little shaky. “That feels really good. You can do that. But keep kissing me? The closeness is what’s doing it for me.”
Kissing him, as requested, I pressed my hips into him again. Each roll drew another quiet sound from him, each one sparking through me like a lit fuse. And then I felt it, the undeniable press of his hard-on straining upward against me through his jeans.
“You’re hard,” I breathed in awe, not from disbelief in his attraction, but because some part of me hadn’t let myself believe this moment could exist for us. That he’d want me this way.
“Turns out when someone you care about a whole hell of a lot kisses you like you’re the only thing in their world ... Yeah, you’ve got my dick’s attention. He’s very on board with the combo of emotional connection, feelings, plus spicy situation happening right now. This sorcery you’re pulling doesn’t even come close to how I imagined this would go.”
“Wait, wait, back up. You fantasize about me?”
“Yeah, but like soft fantasies. Where the sexy stuff, the physical stuff, is like an extension of these huge feelings I have for you. It’s more about the emotions than the act itself. Does that make sense?”
My lips brushed his temple, his brow, his nose, before pressing a tender kiss to his mouth. “Tell me.”
“About my fantasies?”
“Yes.”
“Well... I’ve imagined about a thousand versions of kissing you. Some soft and sweet. Some where I’m hanging on because if I let go, I’ll straight-up lose my mind. All of them were good, like, premium material, but I gotta say my mind didn’t get me anywhere near the real thing. The way you kiss?” He made a little explosion sound and mimed his hand blowing apart. “Next level.”
