Ottis raised an eyebrow. The flames subsided, and Doc settled Marcie back in his lap. “Anything?”
“Pickup lines,” Hijinks whispered. “Embroidered on your pillows and underwear.”
Doc shot him a narrow-eyed look.
“Pickup lineson your sex toys,” Hijinks added with unholy delight. “Charm them so they’ll read aloud the pickup lines while they’re in use.”
“No,” Doc said, horrified. “You’renotallowed to do that.”
Hijinks cackled. “I will refrain from it in the future.”
“In thefuture?” Doc asked. “But what about thepast?”
“The past is a black box of mystery,” Hijinks said solemnly, and promptly disappeared from sight.
Ottis exchanged a look with Doc.
“Fuck,” Doc muttered, glancing at the stairs.
“You have sex toys?” Ottis asked. “I mean, aside from the plug?”
“I ordered some this past week. Hijinks, please tell me you didn’t fuck with them.”
“I didn’t fuck them!” Hijinks yelled back.
“That’s not an answer,” Doc growled.
“Feel free to use them,” the butler’s disembodied voice replied. “They’re perfectly safe.”
Doc growled louder.
But now Ottis was curious. “What kind of sex toys did you buy? Do we even need them?”
Doc shifted a little, like maybe he was... self-conscious? “Let me just make sure they haven’t been tampered with.”
He handed Marcie back to Ottis, turning toward the stairs.
Ottis stood up hurriedly, the peppers on his lap scattering everywhere. “Wait for me! I wanna see them too!”
Doc paused. “Really?”
“Yeah! You were gonna use them on me, right?”
Doc turned pink. “Yes. But it was going to be a surprise. When I presented them to you, I mean.”
“I want to see.” Ottis looked down when Marcie wriggled in his arms. He sighed. “When Marcie’s asleep.”
“I guess I’ll wait.” Doc sighed too and sat back down. He gathered the crinkly packages and lined them neatly on the coffee table, stealing a pepper and turning it around in his hands.
“You can eat that if you want,” Ottis offered.
Doc moved his jaw. “Maybe later.”
“If this is about your scars, you know you don’t have to worry, right? I’m not going to run away, no matter what you look like.”
Doc’s eyebrows shot up. “Last week, you said you weren’t sure about your reaction to them.”
“I’m sure now,” Ottis said, letting his steady heartbeat speak for itself. “I’m not going to run.”
