What I am feeling is the Jag. After I get cleaned up, I’ll get online and see if I can find anything similar that might need some TLC. Nothing like digging into a new project to occupy my mind.
Except the second I step inside my apartment, I’m hit with the lingering scent of Lexi. It’s a mixture of vanilla, peppermint, sweat, and sex. Grinning, I think about why she smelled like the last two for most of the night and this morning. Contemplate ways to have her smelling like that again.
What will it take to get her back here?
Should I invite her to dinner? I’ve fed her breakfast and lunch, once it’s delivered, why not dinner too?
Mentally rolling through what I have on hand, I head for the bathroom where the scent of Lexi is stronger. It makesperforming my usual shower activity easier than ever. Stripping down, I jump under the spray and grab my cock.
Squeezing and stroking, I take it slow. Close my eyes and pull up the reel of memories instead of the fantasies I’ve been using before now.
It doesn’t take long for me to be breathing hard and thrusting my hips. The images in my head are enough to get me off, but the rough grip of my hand on my swollen flesh adds to the sensations. Especially when I imagine Lexi’s hand wrapped around me. When I imagine her on her knees, one small hand gripping the base of my shaft while the other squeezes my balls, those plump lips sucking on the head.
“Fuck!”
I come with a growl, a full-body buck that has me slamming my free hand onto the wall to keep me upright. My legs shake, my cock pulsing in my hand as the last of my come spurts on the floor.
When the shaking stops, when my breath isn’t so labored, I stand straight and duck my head under the water. It’s going cold, and as much as I probably need a cold shower, I don’t want one. Washing off quickly, I flick off the water and grab a towel.
Maybe if I keep jerking off, I won’t want to jump Lexi the second I see her. Laughing, I drag the towel over my head. Yeah, right. I just came like a teenager getting off to his first fantasy and if Lexi walked through the door, I’d push her against the wall and fuck us both stupid.
13
ALEXANDRIA
“Chinese is always a hit, right?” Stopped at a red light, I glare at the bag on the passenger seat like it’s the reason I have no idea what Garrett likes to eat other than not pizza. “Shit.”
What if he’s got some aversion to Chinese?
Oh hell. Dumplings are made with dough.
“Shit. Shit. Shit.”
I should have called ahead. Should have messaged at least. Dammit. I shouldn’t be driving to Garrett’s place at all. There is nothing we need to talk about that couldn’t be said over the phone.
“Turn around.” My fingers grip the wheel tightly. “Just go home.”
I do neither. Instead, I continue to follow the instructions on my GPS even though I memorized where he lives this morning when the censorious ride-share driver took me home.
“Dammit. I am not a timid little doormat!”
And right there is the reason this thing with Garrett freaks me out.
The echo of my ex’s words are in my head. They’re etched on my sub-conscious and in spite of the work I’ve done, the progress I’ve made since discovering Julian’s betrayal, on some level, I believe him.
“Why the fuck do I believe a lying cheat?” The question echoes around me, the sound far more comforting in spite of its content than the one of Julian’s voice in my head.
I need to remind myself who he really is, forget the man I thought he was, and accept everything about that time in my life was a lie. Well, his side of it. My love for the man I believed him to be was definitely real. It’s probably why it’s taking me so long to move past that chapter of my life.
Or maybe I just need to turn the page and start a new one.
I thought I had when I started dating. Except last night—and today—feel more real than anything has in months. This thing with Garrett is confusing me in a way I never saw coming. And yet, I feel more comfortable, more grounded, than I have in years.
And doesn’t that shine a light through the mirage that was my marriage.
“Your destination is on the left,” the sexy British dude tells me.
Focusing on the road in front, I indicate and pull into the driveway of Garrett’s garage. House. I stare at the building in front of me. Warehouse?
