He smiles up at me. “Are you coming for pizza?”
“Can Hazel come?” Monroe asks Leighton.
I leave Leighton to answer Monroe and lean into Callie. “Can I talk to you before we head out to dinner?” This time I act nicely instead of taking her by her hand and dragging her away from her friend.
“Look who learned his manners.” Leighton laughs.
Callie smiles. “Okay, sure.” She slides her hand into mine. “Let’s go check that dishwasher.” She winks.
I feel as if I’m about to be sick. She probably thinks I want to celebrate my win, and I hate that I’m about to blindside her.
“We’ll meet you there,” I tell Leighton.
I really hope Penelope and Hazel will not be joining us for dinner.
We walk out of the stadium, and thankfully it’s a weeknight, so not as many fans are hanging around the bars and restaurants. The sidewalk isn’t that busy, and I want to spit the words out, but they clog my throat. I should wait until we reach the condo anyway, since I’m not sure how Callie will react.
“People were going crazy. Did you hear them all cheering and yelling for you?” she says.
God, she’s oblivious, and I fucking hate it.
“A little, but I end up with tunnel vision when I’m in the zone like that.”
She tugs on my hand. “Hey, be happy. You should be on a high.”
“It’s just my job.” I’m struck for a moment because I’ve never once thought of baseball as just my job. It’s always been my priority, my number one, my life. There is nothing bigger or better than who I am on the mound.
“And you deserve a raise after that performance.”
I shake my head.
“Foster, you came in during the seventh with bases loaded and the leading run on third. No outs. You got out of the inning with three strikeouts.” She’s practically jumping at my side with excitement. Definitely way happier than me. “Then you came back in the eighth and not one player got to first base. And don’t make me talk about the ninth. It was a stellar performance.”
Thankfully, we reach the condo, and I don’t even bother to look at the cardboard sign because I just want to get this over with.
“I’m gonna be honest, I expected a little more than this. I give you a blow job, and you pitch amazing, and you’re still grumpy?” She stops outside the door of our condo while I enter the code into the keypad. “Why aren’t you saying anything?”
We step inside, and I shut the door, flicking the lock, then rest my back against the door.
“I slept with Penelope.” Getting it out doesn’t feel as good as I thought.
Her smile and excitement are doused like a bucket of water on a flame. “Oh…” She turns and heads to her room, but stops in the doorway and circles back around. Facing me, her eyes meet mine, strong and steadfast. “When?”
Oh fuck. I’m an idiot.
“No, I mean… Jesus, I knew I’d fuck this up.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Not recently. I’m sorry, I should have phrased that differently.”
She shakes her head. “It’s fine. It’s not like we’re anything, right? I mean, we’re just co-parenting, but I did think we had agreed?—”
“Callie, it was back in college.” I push off the door. “I swear to you. It was so long ago.”
She nods. “Oh, okay then.”
I take her hands, and she lets me lead her to the couch. “Her dad was my coach in college, and it was a short-lived attempt at a relationship. I, of course, fucked it up and was a total dick to her. But I wanted you to know. I didn’t want you in the dark when she obviously knows what happened. It felt unfair to you.”
She’s staring at her hands, but she nods. “I knew you slept with other people. I have no right to be mad, but…” She looks up, and there’s not really hurt in her eyes but something else I can’t figure out. “I thought you meant now and… well…” She shakes her head. “I mean, it’s fine. I’ve slept with people. Not anyone you know, but clearly, we’ve both had partners. It’s a little weird since I’ll have to see her and stuff, but we aren’t anything anyway, right?”
I take her hands and want to tell her we are something. Ask if she feels the same way I do because I’ve never felt anything like it before. But she doesn’t need my bullshit while she’s pregnant. And what if this doesn’t last? What if right after I tell her, those feelings disappear? I’ve never been a person someone could rely on. Never been the kind of person someone wanted to stay for.
