I rolled my neck, shrugging it off, my tongue coated with the taste of copper because her rings had split the inside of my lip.
Theo made a low, angry sound in the back of his throat and tried to move forward, but I grabbed him.
“That’s assault,” I told Maddie.
She retreated a step, eyes wide as she searched the crowd for support. “She pushed me into it. You heard what she said.”
“I didn’t hear anything,” Angela Renner spoke up. “But I did see you hit Stella unprovoked, and I’ll be happy to tell the police that when they arrive.”
“So will I,” Mrs. Ashley added.
I leaned forward and smiled, knowing it must look deranged because of the blood coating my teeth, “Run, Maddie. It’s the only thing you’re good at.”
She fled.
Someone started clapping, but others shushed them. Once she was out of sight, the crowd’s focus shifted to me, and my panic rose. I needed to get out of here.
Theo noticed and dragged me in the opposite direction, through a door labeled “Employees Only” and into an empty hallway.
“Fuck, that was incredible,” he said, drinking me in like it was his first time seeing me.
I spun away from him and paced down the hall, my arms wrapped around my burning stomach, my entire body trembling with unspent rage. I didn’tfeelincredible. Instead, I felt like I could scream. Like I might puke. I was so fucking angry at Maddie for showing up at this party and so fucking angry at Theo for practically forcing me back in here, but also so fucking proud of myself for how I’d handled that. For not letting my feelings get the better of me in the moment. For finding a way to goad Maddie into slipping up and revealing the real her.
There were too many emotions in my body right now, and since I wasn’t giving them any other outlet, they manifested as tears. I did my best to fight them, but a sob slipped through my lips.
Theo snagged my elbow and yanked me into a hug, his arms banding around me, his warmth seeping into my skin. I immediately relaxed into his hold, burying my face in his jacket and breathing in the smell of him.
“Are you okay?”
“Why do you even care?” I muttered into his shirt. “You hate me. Remember?”
He sighed, holding me tighter. “I don’t hate you. I hated who I thought you were.”
I had no idea what to say to that, so I kept quiet, fighting back the continued threat of tears because I didn’t do this. I didn’t lose it in public. I held everything together until I was back in the safety of my own apartment, where I could cry in the shower until the water ran cold.
“How’d you get here?” Theo asked. “I can have one of the valets bring your car around so I can drive you home.”
I shook my head. “I don’t have a car. I don’t even have a license. I haven’t driven since that night.”
He was quiet for a second, and when he spoke, his voice was softer. “Then I’ll take you home in mine. There’s a bathroom behind you if want to check your makeup first.”
I pulled free from his arms without a backward glance.
For a moment there, I’d forgotten myself, forgotten that he was the last person I should look to for comfort. I wouldn’t even be in this position if it weren’t for him. He wasn’t a safe harbor in the storm; he was the lightning about to strike. And no, he might not hate me anymore, but I still didn’t think that would stop him from setting fire to my entire life if I didn’t uphold my side of our bargain.
I checked to make sure I was alone in the bathroom and then locked the door behind me before approaching the mirror. Thankfully, I’d gone light on tonight’s makeup, and it wasn’t smeared that badly. I grabbed a couple paper towels from the dispenser and tried to blot away a few smudges of mascara, but my hands shook so much that I nearly jabbed myself in the eye.
I set the paper towel down and turned to inspect my face. My cheek was already red and swelling. Maddie had hit me pretty good. Leaning in, I carefully pulled my lip up to see that yup, the inside was cut, and I knew that until it healed, it would serve as a reminder of that awful interaction.
God, I should have walked away. The second I caught sight of Maddie, I should have turned and left the building, with or without Theo. I’d been wrong. Standing my ground hadn’t made me feel any better. It hadn’t brought me closure. In fact, I felt worse, because at the end of all my maladaptive daydreams about confronting Maddie, she did the right thing. She turned herself into the police, promised to confess, and attempted to make everything right.
Now I felt like a fool. Because some small part of me had obviously been holding out false hope that would all come true. Had thought there was at least a minuscule chance she might be capable of change, becauseIhad changed.
But I should have known better. Sure, I’d been a stupid, self-centered asshole for most of my life, but I’d never done anything malicious; only reckless. Maddie was different, and people like her didn’t suddenly wake up one morning and decide to right all their wrongs. She’d gotten away with something terrible, and she was going to hide inside her crystal palace where she was safe, probably dying old and happy, surrounded by her loving family because there was no justice in this world.
Theo was right to be so full of hate and vitriol. To wish ill upon everyone in my parents’ socioeconomic class. To assume that people were guilty until proven innocent. So far, I’d given him the worst of the names. Those I thought were on par with Maddie. But there were others I’d withheld. People who might not be inherently evil, but had still done bad things. Well, I would spare them no more. I’d hand each and every one over to Theo and let him be their judge, jury, and executioner.
Because fuck them.
