Anyway, today I’m finally being discharged and will follow-up with Doc at the clubhouse.As long as I continue eating, he doesn’t see this happening again.I have a feeling I won’t have a problem eating because there’s a quiet determination in Kreed that makes me feel as if he won’t let me slide backwards again.That he’ll make sure I eat even on my bad days when I don’t want to because I’m scared of being punished for some reason.
Doc did mention it might be a good idea to see if I can find a counselor to talk to.Not just to help me work through my eating disorder but to help start my road to recovery from all of the trauma I’ve suffered over the years.Right now, I don’t know how to talk to anyone about what I’ve been through and I don’t want to burden them with the details of years of abuse.Especially Kreed.He’s already taken on so much and I’m worried he’ll treat me differently once he learns how truly broken I am.Of everything that’s been done to me over the years.He’s the last person I want to look at me differently or stop talking to me because of what’s been done to me.
“Pixie, I have to head into work for a few hours today.Caleb is backed-up and needs me to lend a hand with the time I’ve taken off over the last week.Roger is on his way over to hang out with you.Will you be okay while I’m gone?”Kreed asks as we pull into the compound from the hospital and he parks near the door.
“I’ll be okay.Roger will make sure I eat lunch and have a snack before dinner time.He knows Doc’s orders as well as you do.If you’re not back for dinner, I’m sure he’ll make sure I eat whatever is made at the clubhouse.Or he’ll take me out for dinner,” I assure him as he shuts the engine off.
“Do you need anythin’ before I change and head out?”he questions me before getting out and coming around to my door to open it and help me out.
“I don’t think so.Doc said to take it easy and not do too much just yet.I still have to wear the brace on my wrist so that takes out cleaning and a lot of cooking.Though if I have help, I’m sure I could make dinner and lunch,” I answer him as he laces our fingers together and leads me inside the clubhouse.
“Not gonna cook, Pixie.Doc said rest so you need to rest.Your body has been through a lot and needs time to recover.Please rest and sit down today.If you have to hang out in your room, then that’s what you do.Or you can sit out back with Roger and enjoy the sun.It’s a nice day today,” he says, stopping to look at me so I can see how worried he is.
“Okay.Roger won’t let me do anything I’m not supposed to.It might be nice to sit outside for a while,” I say as Viper walks in behind us and heads for the kitchen.
“I’m makin’ lunch, Annistyn.How about a sub and chips today?”he asks, pausing long enough for my answer.
“That sounds good.I can’t eat a whole sub though,” I say remembering my attempt at the hospital to eat a full one.
“I know.I’ll make you a small one.Ham and cheese on toasted bread?”he asks, his voice full of laughter because I tried to eat so much that day I almost got sick.My stomach hurt for a while after that and I didn’t eat for a few hours.
“Yes, please,” I respond as Kreed leads me to the bar where Laurie is already working.
“Annistyn, it’s good to have you back,” she greets me with a large smile on her face.
“It’s good to be back,” I return, my voice slightly louder than normal as I give her a small smile back.
“Auntie!”I hear yelled from behind me and I turn to find Cali walking in the common room with her kids.Rory, her oldest daughter races over to me and stops just before colliding with the stool I’m sitting on.“Are you better?”
“I am better.Your mommy brought me your drawings and they brightened up my room so much.Kreed said I could put them on his refrigerator so we can see them all the time,” I tell her as she starts bouncing in front of me and laughing.
“Unca, you’re so funny!Pictures go on the fridge,” she says as if we should already know that.“Drawings go on the wall.”
“Is that right, Little Miss?”he questions her, kneeling down on her level as she hugs him.
“Uh-huh.”
Rory is lifted up in Kreed’s arms and placed on the barstool next to me.She accepts the cup of chocolate milk from Laurie and grabs a straw from the glass that’s set in front of her.Laurie hands me a bottle of water and I’m given a straw by Rory to use.I accept it from her small hand and place it in the bottle once I have it opened.Bryce takes a seat on my other side and accepts the juice from Laurie.He chooses not to accept a straw from his sister until she starts pouting and he gives in.I smile at their interaction because Bryce cares all about keeping his siblings happy even if it means doing something he doesn’t want to do.
“Alright, Pixie.I’m gonna head out.Roger should be here soon.They know to let him in and I told him you’d be in the common room.Cali, you gonna keep her company until he gets here?”Kreed asks, his voice full of worry as he steps up close to me.
“I’ll be here.Bryce has practice later, but until then I’ve got nothing but time.The kids wanted to see Annistyn so they won’t be leaving her side anytime soon,” she answers as Kreed bends down to press a kiss on the top of my head.
“I’ll have my phone on me at all times today.You need me, don’t hesitate to call.Even if you just need to hear my voice.You’ve been given a ton of information over the last week.And I’ll try to get you into the physical therapy center here in town.Doc doesn’t want your muscles to get even weaker than they already are,” he says once he pulls back.
“Okay,” I respond before Dakota grabs my attention by lifting her arms up in front of me.Kreed lifts her into my arms and I get her comfortable on my lap while Kylan takes a seat on the other side of Rory.
Dakota nestles into my body and I savor the feeling of her body weight against me.She’s so small and precious and I love holding her.She’s the first of Cali’s kids who came up to me and I saw someone put their blind trust in me without hesitation.This sweet, innocent little girl entrusted me with her safety and needs in the blink of an eye.It’s the first time I honestly thought about having kids of my own.Before, it was never something I thought about because I was always locked away on the farm or in some cage once I was sold.
Kreed heads upstairs to change into something older for work.He isn’t up there for long before coming back down and placing another kiss on the top of my head and leaving.I listen to his bike when he starts the engine and revs it a few times before he pulls away.
“I have to warn you about something,” Cali says once the kids are all settled with drinks and snacks.
“Did I do something wrong?”I ask, immediately reverting back to my old way of thinking.
“Not at all.You just got out of the hospital, Annistyn.I just found out there are at least two more clubs that will be showing up today or tomorrow,” Cali says as she waits for my reaction.“These are clubs I’ve been around most of my life and everyone is so nice.The guys all look rough and tough, but they’re teddy bears.You’ll really like Tank.He’s the biggest of them all but truly understands us and will listen to you talk for hours without making you feel as if you’re burdening him.He also gives the best advice ever.You’ll meet Caleb’s parents, his grandpa and grandma, and Tank is actually his uncle.I’m not sure if the kids will be coming with them, but I know the parents will all be here.It’s been a long time since all the clubs were together in one location.”
“Oh.Um, well, I can hide in my room if I have to,” I tell her as I’m filled with anxiety at the thought of so many new people showing up in front of me.Especially a bunch of guys I’ve never met before.
