My arms wind around her, and I pull her back to my chest.“He’s fine, baby, and so are you.”
She wipes away the tears streaming down her cheeks, and I lead her back to my bedroom.I pull down the blanket and help her slide in, then I lay my body down beside her.She curls into me, laying her head on my chest, and I wrap my arms tightly around her waist.
She’s quiet for so long I think she might have fallen asleep, but then she speaks, her voice barely audible.“I saw a man die tonight.”
I close my eyes, pulling her closer.“I’m sorry, baby.I’m so sorry you had to see that.”
“He was a regular.He always ordered the same thing—whiskey neat with a beer back.He had three kids.”
I don’t know what to say, so I just listen.
“When the paramedics were checking me, all I could think was that I needed to see Dylan.And you.”She tilts her head up to look at me.“I needed to see you.”
Something shifts inside me at her words, a certainty settling deep in my bones.“I’m right here,” I tell her.“And I’m not going anywhere.”
She presses her face against my chest again.
“Jess might not make it,” she says, her body shuddering against mine.
I stroke her hair, wishing I could take away the horror she witnessed.“I’m so sorry, baby.”
“What am I going to do, Maddox?The bar is...it’s destroyed.I don’t know how long it’s going to take to get it back up and running, and even then, who is gonna want to come grab a drink at a bar someone tried to bomb?”
“We’ll figure it out,” I tell her, meaning every word.“Together.You don’t have to worry about any of that tonight.”
She falls silent, her breathing gradually evening out as exhaustion claims her.I lie awake, holding her, unable to close my eyes.Every time I do, I imagine what could have happened, and terror grips me all over again.
I brush my lips against her forehead again, whispering words I’m not sure she’s ready to hear.
“I love you, sweetheart.I love you so fucking much.”
ChapterTwenty-One
Amelia
The smell of smoke still clings to my hair even after the three showers I took this morning.I don’t think it’ll ever go away, nor will the memories of last night.I keep seeing Jess pinned under the mechanical bull, flames dancing around her as she cries for help and I’ve been struggling with the guilt.
I could’ve helped her.
I could’ve pulled her out of there.
But I did nothing.
I was paralyzed by fear, and the image of Dylan’s face.If I had died last night, I don’t know what would’ve happened to him.I’m all he has, and that realization is terrifying.I suppose Shadow would’ve taken him in, but no parent wants to think of their child existing in a world without them.
And then there’s Maddox.When I wasn’t praying for God to spare me and bring me back to my son, I thought of the man who charged back into my life so unexpectedly and unapologetically, and I realized something else.
I wanted to live for him too.
When I showed up at his door last night, soot-stained and shaking, he swept me into his arms.
“I’ve got you.”
I didn’t know how badly I needed to hear those words until he spoke them, and I don’t think it was the meaning of them that made them so powerful.
It was hearing them come from him.
It was his actions that followed that proved them true.
