“To get some air and clear my head.”
The door slams, and immediately Amber turns to face me. “What the hell is wrong with your sister?”
So many things.
She spends a few minutes talking on the phone with Eddie, between tears of frustration and confusion. He seemed to console her pretty well, but she still looks lost and defeated.
She moves to the center of the room and throws herself onto the couch, laying down on it like I’m suddenly her therapist.
“Tell me the truth, Poppy, am I making a mistake?” Her head flops over to look my way.
I shrug. Knowing everything I know, the last thing I want to do is hash out Amber’s relationship with her, but I do because I know it’s important. “You really don’t want my opinion, Amber. You know that I’ve never really been Eddie’s biggest fan, so I’m probably the last person you should ask. I will ask you this, though. Can you picture your life without Eddie in it?”
She’s silent for seven heartbeats before she speaks again.
“No, I can’t.”
“Then there’s your answer. All I can say is that if you love him and you think he’s the one, fight for it. Once you give up the fight, any hope for a future between you both is gone. If I had to guess, this is your guy’s last shot at making it work.”
I never thought my own words would slice through me like knives, but they do. As I’m throwing them out there, thoughts of Wesley’s aggravating face bombard me. He gave up on me five years ago, and now any sliver of hope we had of having something is gone.
This is on him… not me.
So, why was he looking at me like I was still his whole world?
“I think I’m gonna head to bed. Thanks for the pep talk, Poppy. I believe it helped.” Amber stumbles to her room, both of us disoriented by the Pippa hurricane that just ran through our apartment.
Amber’s always been the kind of person who can overcome anything. Me, on the other hand, has the tendency to overthink things and drive myself mad.
At least one of us isn’t spiraling anymore. I’m over here trying to figure out what to do about my crazy sister, holding onto the mother of all secrets, while navigating my friendship with the one girl who’s never really put Pippa before me.
Loyalty has never felt this disjointed before.
And love?
I’m not even sure what that is. All I know is that Wesley suddenly popping up in my life again has my head going all crazy, and the stress of it all is making that familiar headache form.
So, instead of going to bed to sleep it off, I march over to the picture, grab a tab from the hiding place, and let that shit dissolve on my tongue, allowing the numbness to take over.
Tomorrow will be better…because in the morning I won’t remember half of this.
Chapter Eight
Wesley
(A few weeks later…)
Rich stretches out on the couch, his long torso bare, his newly formed muscles rippling. At home, he’s not afraid to show his face. He wears his scars with pride, something I wish he did outside of these walls.
“What are you doing?” he questions when he sees me filtering through some social media pictures on our shared computer.
“Is it just me, or was something off about Poppy yesterday?” I question.
“Is this about the little argument you guys got into yesterday?”
Shaking my head, I stop on a recent picture of her and Amber, then move forward a few years… to the years before I saw her again.
To others, it wouldn’t be so evident, but to someone like me. Someone who has spent hours just staring at her and admiring her, it’s more noticeable.
