No, he shouldn’t have yelled at me across the mall.
“Know what I want for Christmas?” I turned to Santa. “I’d like for Cole Frost to get that stick out of his butt, get out of my business, and get out of my house.”
Santa gasped, his eyes growing wide. Then he sighed deeply. “I wish you hadn’t said and done that, Aubrey.”
“Why?” I smoothed my skirt. The elf beside Isaac had turned her glare on me now. “He is such a pain in my…posterior. It would only be fair if he left me alone.”
He shook his head. “I can’t speak to what’s fair, but now you’re on the Not So Nice List.”
The what?
This guy was taking the Santa thing too far. “There’s no such thing as a Not So Nice list. Nor a Naughty List. And if there were, Cole Frost would be at the top of it.”
“Oh, there’s very much a Naughty List, and now you’re close to being on it. The Not So Nice List is for boys and girls who’ve been very, very good all year, only to have a lapse in judgment in December.”
I crossed my arms over my chest and tilted my head to the side in what Mom used to call my sassy look. Nothing like visiting Santa to make me regress, I guess. “So what? I wasn’t going to get anything for Christmas anyway.”
Santa sighed and shook his head. “Oh, Aubrey. Just because you had one bad Christmas back in 2006 doesn’t mean that the Naughty List—or the Not So Nice List—isn’t a thing.”
“Wait. How…?”
“It wasn’tmyfault you didn’t get that Wii, I’ll have you know. But being on the Not So Nice List is about more than getting passed over for toys. You see, naughty begets naughty, so it’s kinda like, well, being on the Not So Nice List is a lot like always having Mercury in retrograde—especially for adults. If you’re on the Not So Nice List, nothing is going to go right for you for an entire year.”
“Oh, for crying out loud.” I rolled my eyes so far into the back of my head I could almost see the Starbucks kiosk behind me. “I don’t believe in astrology or luck, and I don’t believe in Santa either.”
It was his turn to tilt his head to the side and study me with a stern look. “You don’t mean that, Aubrey.”
“I totally do.”
“So you didn’t check your horoscope this morning?”
I opened my mouth to reply, but I wasn’t about to lie to Santa. “Fine. I did read my horoscope. But how did you…?”
His eyes twinkled.
More than a little weirded out, I backed up one step, then two, and then tripped over a cord to the photography lights and fell flat on my ass.
Isaac laughed out loud, the sound echoing around the blessedly empty mall. I looked to see if Cole might have returned to the little white picket fence that cordoned off Santa’s Wonderland. He wasn’t there. I couldn’t tell if I was relieved or disappointed. At least he wouldn’t have laughed at me.
Santa got up with a grunt and waddled over to offer me a hand. He lifted an eyebrow as if to say, “See?”
“This is ridiculous,” I muttered under my breath, but I took his hand and let him pull me to my feet. Digging deep for my manners, I said, “Well, thank you for the photo shoot, Mister…?”
“Kringle. Kris Kringle.”
“Right.” I jabbed a thumb over my shoulder in the direction of my boss. “Isheon the Naughty List?”
Santa sighed. “I don’t think he’s ever left it.”
Well, that might be an argument for the existence of such a list.
I nodded and went on my not so merry way. I’d driven myself so I wouldn’t have to be in close quarters with Isaac. If I hurried I could have a few minutes of peace after my drive back to work.
As I’d hoped,I beat Isaac back to the office. He’d gone to Starbucks without even asking me if I’d like something. Mind you, if I did the same, I’d hear about it.
He’d hardly gotten settled in his office before he buzzed me in. “Aubrey!”
I rolled my shoulders back and reminded myself that I was a responsible adult. I could hold down a job, even if it was a crappy one. I would work hard and get a promotion and get through this.
