He helped her down from the counter and walked with her to the bedroom. “Do you need any help? With getting them settled back down, I mean?”
“I think I can do it,” she responded, letting him off the hook. He didn’t want to hold them. And she wasn’t ready to see him hold them, then walk away. Again.
It took only seconds to see that Nori was the most upset. “Poor baby,” she crooned at her youngest as she lifted her from her crib. “Did I scare you with all that noise? It’s okay.”
She could probably get the twins settled back down if she could get Nori out of the room. “Hold on, you two,” she said. “Let me put your sister in her bouncy seat, and I’ll be right back.”
Bliss walked into the great room with Nori. Connor jumped to his feet from the armchair. “Is she all right?” He looked almost panicked, but Bliss didn’t dare smile.
“She’s fine. I just need to put her down out here while I settle the twins. You sit back down, and I’ll be right back to tend to her.”
She’d have been afraid to leave her in the room with Connor if he hadn’t looked so terrified. There was no way he’d go near Nori until she could get back. She’d hurry because the last thing she needed was for Connor to figure things out on his own.
Racing back to the bedroom with Connor’s, “Don’t run!” chasing her, she put on the nightlight that played calming music and settled the twins back down to rest. It couldn’t have taken more than five minutes. Five minutes of whispered lullabies and gentle pats, then she could send him on his way.
She knew something was wrong the second she didn’t hear Nori crying. Tiptoeing out of the bedroom, she took one step into the great room and froze. Connor was no longer seated in the armchair. Not even close.
Connor stood beside the now-empty bouncy seat with a contented Nori cradled in his arms. Bliss sucked in a breath. He was holding his own daughter and didn’t even know. She had to tell him, but now that the time was here, doubts bombarded her.
What had she been thinking? Her heart began pounding in her ears.
She listened for advice from Mary Poppins and Miranda, but her shoulder angels had deserted her. All she heard was Mary Poppins inviting Miranda to go fly a kite with her. Then they disappeared in shimmering puffs of smoke, leaving her alone with Connor and Nori.
That Connor looked stunned was no surprise. He stared at Nori with his bright amber eyes, the ones he’d passed down to his daughter. In a voice whose volume belied its tone, he demanded, “Last night you had something to tell me. You want to do that now?”
Her mouth went completely dry, and her stomach dropped all the way down to her toes. Wrapping her arms around her like armor, she tried to explain. It took three tries before she got the words out. “I don’t expect anything, I promise. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to feel trapped. I know you said you were never going to have children. I know that hasn’t changed. I…”
Oh, god. This was terrible. He was going to hate her forever, and that was the real reason she hadn’t told him. She was a coward. She couldn’t bear the thought of losing him. All because of a day and a half that happened almost a year ago. But it was the best day and a half of her life, except for when she got her girls.
And now it was over, and there was nothing to do but face the music. “I thought you should at least know that you have a daughter.”
Hope flashed in Connor’s eyes, only to be extinguished the next second by rage. “I do not have a child. I told you I never would, and you’re right, that hasn’t changed. Now I’d appreciate it if you’d come get your daughter.” His voice had gone cold and hard as steel.
The words shot through her chest, piercing her heart like bullets. Silently, she crossed to him and took Nori from his stiff arms.
Without a word or so much as a backward glance, Connor spun on his heel and stalked out. The front door slammed hard enough to rattle the windows.
Bliss hugged her daughter to her chest and whispered words of love as the tears ran unchecked down her face. And for the first time since she’d arrived in Darling, the house felt unbearably, heartbreakingly empty.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Connor spun out of Bliss’s yard, slinging rocks and dirt as he sped down the dirt road and out onto the highway. He didn’t remember driving and couldn’t tell you which way he turned when, but twenty minutes later, he wound up at Deep Dive.
The night air roared through his open window, cold and sharp, but it did nothing to cool the inferno burning through his chest.
The Deep Dive Bar was on the first floor of a large two-story warehouse. The floor above the bar housed Sabre Security's offices. Reid owned both businesses but had turned the day-to-day running of Deep Dive over to Hutch. He’d done the same with Sabre Security, turning it over to Sawyer. Neon lights flickered over the entrance, and bass from the sound system thumped faintly through the concrete walls.
Mind still reeling, Connor found himself seated at the bar with Hutch handing him a tall mug of Astronaut Status beer. He didn’t even wait for the thick foam to settle before throwing it back and emptying the mug. The bitter brew burned down his throat, but the numbness he wanted refused to come.
“Damn, brother, what’s going on?” Hutch asked. “You usually at least try to taste it.”
Connor’s fingers tightened around the empty mug like it had personally offended him. “Just get me another one,” Connor all but snarled.
He had a daughter. A kid. Fuck him. When he’d seen her back in Darling and pregnant, he’d assumed the Society had given her to some fucker to get her pregnant to teach her a lesson.
He refused to think about the kick to the gut that had been. But the memory slammed into him again anyway, sharp and ugly.
He’d felt like a total failure for months. Still did, if he was honest. And that whole fuckin’ time, she’d been pregnant with his child. How could she not tell him the baby was his?
