Just one more minute. She’d soak this feeling up and store it away for the future when she’d be alone again to love, cherish, feed, and protect her three babies.
She pressed her cheek against him, still sniffling. The steadiness of his heartbeat warmed her. He was solid and safe and temptingly permanent.
A lifetime with Connor would have been wonderful.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Connor stifled a groan when he and Bliss pulled up at Reid and Winnie’s house, which was already decked out for Christmas. Hell, the place looked like Santa’s workshop had thrown up all over it. The roofline sparkled, the porch glowed warm gold, and even the bushes had little white lights. The decorated tree in the front window was nice, though. If Reid put one of those inflatable reindeer in his front yard, Connor wouldn’t be surprised.
Shaking his head, Connor sighed. The things Daddies did for their Littles. He knew it was for Winnie because Reid had damn sure never decorated his house before. All the houses in Arcadian Hills looked the same.
And then there was his house, standing bereft of adornment at the back of the subdivision. He could practically hear the letter being typed with passive-aggressive cheer about “holiday participation expectations.” If he got one more notice from the MDC–the Musketiara Decorations Committee–about not joining in the community spirit, he was going to spank someone. Make that several someones.
He'd get to it. Eventually. This year was no different from the ones before. Another year where he’d put off doing anythingto decorate his house. Of course, now the Musketiaras gave him more grief about being a Scrooge than he could take. He’d string up lights and decorate his tree just to see the smiles on their faces.
Then an image hit him square in the chest. Four little girls—not Littles, actual toddlers with his blond hair and Bliss’s gorgeous ocean foam eyes—in fuzzy pajamas staring up at his glowing tree, eyes wide, voices squealing.
And then he couldn’t stop wondering if Bliss would laugh or roll her eyes at his half-assed attempt at holiday cheer. Sure, a four-foot artificial tree from the local discount store wasn’t much, but he liked it.
Everyone else went out to Pine & Danni’s Christmas Tree Farm and chopped down their own giant Christmas tree. The Littles loved it. They turned it into a whole production, complete with hot cocoa, pictures, and bragging rights that lasted until New Year’s. The guys had a contest to see who could chop down their tree the fastest.
Maybe he was a Scrooge, but Christmas held no fond memories. He was probably the only kid in his town who’d rather be in school than at home during the holidays. His dad was a drunk and not a nice one. He’d beat the hell out of anyone he could catch whenever he was hammered. The smell of cheap whiskey and pine cleaner still haunted him, even when December rolled around.
Winnie ran out the front door and across the yard as they pulled up in front of the house. Her sparkly boots crunched across the frosted grass, and her coat flapped open. Because apparently basic survival instincts didn’t apply to Littles in a panic. “Bliss! I’ve been worried! Why didn’t you call me?”
“Tinkerbell!” Reid yelled as he jogged out on her heels. “What did I say about running out into the front yard by yourself?”
Winnie squealed when Reid caught her and tossed her over his shoulder, smacking her ass as he loped back inside. “Come on in, guys. I kept dinner warm for you. Ouch! Daddy, not so hard.” Her laughter floated through the air as Reid carried her back across the yard.
Connor didn’t catch everything Reid said, but it had something to do with clipping fairy wings. Reid set her down just inside the doorway and sent her on her way with one more squeal-inducing smack to her backside. The front door shut behind them, cutting off the sound of their playful argument.
Connor turned to Bliss, and the longing in her eyes took his breath away. The look in her eyes was soft and aching, like she saw something she wanted but didn’t believe she could ever have.
But whose fault was that? He wasn’t the one who ran back to the Society at the first opportunity. He cleared his throat before he spoke. “You ready to go inside?”
Bliss nodded in response. “I need to check on the girls.” Her voice carried that same tired determination he’d heard before.
She reached for the door handle but froze when he grabbed her arm. “Do not touch that handle. I will come around and help you out and into the house.”
She faced him then, and he took the time to take in more than he had before. His gaze traveled over her long, ebony hair that didn’t gleam as much as before. Her smooth, high cheekbones were more angular. Fatigue now dulled her pale turquoise eyes and underscored them with dark circles. Oh, she was still beautiful. Stunning, actually. Butthere was a fragility there now that twisted something deep inside his gut.
A sense of failure overwhelmed him. He’d let her down. He should have tried harder to find her and bring her back home months ago. She needed someone to care for her as much as she cared for those in her life.
More and more, he was fighting the urge to be that someone. She needed a Daddy. And he was beginning to think he needed a Little, too. One with eyes like liquid gemstones. The realization sat heavy in his chest, stubborn and impossible to ignore.
“I can open a car door, Connor.”
He missed the musical quality her voice usually had.
“I didn’t think you couldn’t, Trouble. But just because you can doesn’t mean you’re going to. Not while I’m around.” She was determined to prove she could take care of herself, but he wasn’t so sure.
She sighed and crossed her arms over her chest. But the relief and satisfaction in her eyes didn’t escape him. After he opened her door, he reached in and lifted her into his arms again. She weighed almost nothing, and the realization made his jaw tighten.
“Connor! Put me down!” She squirmed, trying to escape his arms.
That wasn’t going to happen. Not when she’d practically fainted earlier, swept away in a panic attack. Had she been to a doctor since she’d been home? He’d be putting a call in to Bones, Sabre’s go-to doctor, to set one up if she hadn’t.
“Unless you want a taste of what Reid gave your sister, I suggest you calm down.”
