Bliss was fine. She had to be. She had survived things that would have broken most people.
He wasn’t ready to explore why her safety and wellbeing was so important to him. It just was. It always had been. Something about her had called to him from the first time he’d seen her wandering the streets of Darling in one of those ridiculous outfits the Society made her wear.
He could still see it as if it were yesterday.
She’d been handing out tracts, smiling at people, and being way too friendly. Did she have no idea how gorgeous she was? One dude walking past her stared at her so long he ran into a streetlight. What an idiot. She didn’t seem to notice the effect she had on people.
If she’d been his, he’d have been standing at her side to let people know she was taken. That way, there’d be no confusion, and he’d have been there to handle any wandering eyes.Then, when he got her home, he’d have had her bent over the back of the sofa to spank her ass for being so damn beautiful before fucking her senseless for the same reason.
She was still beautiful. She hadn’t seen him since she’d been back, but he’d seen her. She hadn’t changed at all. With a baby in her belly, she’d glowed. She was soft and fierce at the same time, like motherhood had lit something inside her. Why did she still get to him? She was officially off limits, now that she had her girls to take care of.
He rolled his neck and scanned the countryside again.
His first thought after seeing Bliss’s newborn was to question if the child was his. The thought had blindsided him the second he’d seen that beautiful pink face. No one else would ask because no one else knew how he lost control and royally fucked up by making love to his client.
Logically, he shouldn’t wish that baby was his… but he did. He longed to have children, to plant all the babies Bliss wanted in her belly. But he knew what having a shit father could do to a child. And since that was all he’d ever had, he wasn’t about to repeat the mistake and ruin an innocent child’s life.
That was why control was everything. He might be struggling to control his emotions when it came to Bliss, but he could damn sure control his actions. He turned the music up. The swell of violins filled the truck, but it did nothing to drown out the one thought hammering in his chest. Find Bliss.
Merry damn Christmas.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Bliss sat in the middle of the road, staring at her shredded tire and trying not to lose every stinking ounce of her holiday spirit. Which, if she were being honest with herself, was hanging on by a thread thinner than the ribbon on a candy cane. She’d always heard bad things came in threes. Somehow, her luck had missed the memo. Her luck had decided to upgrade to a bulk discount plan.
So much for getting to Winnie’s to pick up her girls on time for once.
Glancing at the phone in her hand, she resisted the urge to throw it as far as she could. She would have done it if it weren’t her one remaining source of sanity. It was also the only device that might eventually connect her to the outside world before frostbite set in. So there was that.
Mary Poppins whispered in her right ear.Just wait for your spoonful of sugar to help this medicine go down.
Bliss straightened her back. Mary Poppins was right. Mary Poppins was always right. That’s why she sat on Bliss’s right shoulder. Not the life-sized Mary Poppins, of course. Bliss had a miniature Mary Poppins sitting on her shoulder, encouraging her to make wise choices. And she managed to do it with animpossibly calm expression that said everything would be fine if Bliss would simply behave like a sensible human being.
Miranda Lambert chirped in Bliss’s left ear.Well, you know what I say, soak that tire in kerosene, light it up, and watch it burn.
Most people had good angels and bad angels sitting on their shoulders. Bliss was no different. It was just that her shoulder angels were Mary Poppins and Miranda Lambert. They gave her advice all the time, mostly in song lyrics. This time, she’d better go with Mary’s advice. Miranda’s solutions were always satisfying, but they generally came with legal consequences.
She glanced down at Tipper, Tipsy for short, her lynx stuffie. Winnie had given Tipsy to her before she escaped from the Society when Bliss was fifteen. It had been Bliss’s only connection to her sister, and she’d kept her all this time.
Tipsy had survived eleven years of tears, secrets, and long nights. Her fur was worn soft from being loved too hard. Right now, Tipsy entertained Sadie and Sophie while she took care of her Nori.
Her girls filled her life with love, joy, and responsibility. And fear. Lots of fear.
Fear that she hadn’t done the right thing, not telling Connor about his daughter. Fear that she wouldn’t be able to do this on her own. Fear that one wrong decision would shatter the fragile, beautiful life she was building for them.
Tipsy’s bright golden eyes reminded her of Connor. How could she miss him so much? She’d only been with him a day and a half, but that day and a half had changed everything. She only allowed herself to use Connor’s name once a day, and today she’d already used it twice.
With a sigh, she focused on the problem at hand. It couldn’t be that hard, right? She should just pull everything out of the trunk and change the stupid tire. Or… she could stand by theroad with her thumb out, hoping someone would have pity on her and take her to Winnie’s house. Given her luck today, she’d probably end up hitching a ride with a traveling accordion salesman.
Pish-posh.Mary Poppins tapped her buttoned shoe on Bliss’s shoulder.Once begun is half done.
Sometimes, Mary Poppins got on Bliss’s very last nerve.
Hugging Tipsy closer to her chest, she stared at the flat tire. The rim almost touching the ground didn’t strike her as being a good thing. “I’ve never actually changed a tire before, Tipsy. Have you?”
Tipsy had never changed a tire, either. They’d have to figure it out together. In a few minutes. Right now, she was going to sit here and imagine following Miranda’s advice and dousing her avocado-green rust-bucket of a car in kerosene and setting it aflame. At least she’d be warm then. And possibly arrested.
She’d left the house this morning without her coat. Again. The pretty teal sweater with the giant appliqued moose she’d worn to work didn’t deserve to be covered up. It should have been fine since her job was inside. All she had to do was walk into Bundles of Joy, where she worked, and then back out to her car at five.
