He’s teasing. Poking fun at me. For a first time, I like it.
Dair reaches up. “And there’s that smile I lo—” He almost snatches his hand back. Then his jaw firms, and he commits to touching me. His thumb skims my lower lip, and so what if I kiss the pad. A clock is ticking, and I’ve done exactly what Kev suggested: I have thought twice, which means I’m sure of this decision. And of Dair, who has to come clean in his kitchen after Adey shouts just like Blake did at the start of the month. “Where are you hiding the coffee?”
“I don’t actually drink it.” He raises his chin in front of an ex-soldier and a barista who once worked magic for kids like me. “I pretended I did because Vincent wanted you and Blake to have a chance to talk. You could do that now, if you wanted. We’ll make the drinks.”
They leave us to fill fancy teacups. I do that until Dair’s arms slide around my middle the same way I’ve wrapped my own around him before. His chest is to my back, and I’m not built to be the small spoon. Turns out I like being that for him almost as much as I like hearing his quiet, “Thank you.”
“For what?” Behind us, laughter erupts from the living room. “For bringing those muppets with me? You won’t thank me once they start their bullshit one-upping each other.”
“No.” His face rests against my shoulder blade. “I mean, yes. Thanks for bringing reinforcements.” I feel his swallow. “What I really mean is, thanks for helping me empty this place. I was going around in circles. There’s no way I would have been done in time, and I would have had to pay a penalty. With their help, I’ll be able to get out before the deadline. If we finish today, I could even give the keys back tomorrow morning. That would be a relief for my foster parents. I’ve been away for longer than any of us thought this would take.”
Dair decides he’s done with being the big spoon to my little. He lets me go to slide between me and the kitchen counter, where he moves aside the tray. Tea slops over gilded edges asDair pushes himself up onto the counter, and I’m still not into bondage but I’ve never been more tempted to check Blake’s pockets. If he’s still got those reins, I’d tie Dair right here for longer.
I have to make do with what I last wanted outside a museum.
I kiss him and I don’t stop.
Bubble wrap pops in the next room and tissue paper rustles as proof that friends are getting busy, so Dair and I get to have this private moment.
I wish to fuck Harry could see how many of them volunteered at short notice.
Kev too, because there’s no denying that I’ve kept these pieces of my life separate from him.
That’s over.
I’ll introduce them. Soon. For now, I stop thinking about anything but Dair, who scoots even closer to me, and I hadn’t thought there was any space left between us. One of Dair’s hands finds where my hair is shorter at the nape of my neck, and until him, I never knew that sensation could make my balls tingle. His other hand finds where Marilyn gets extra careful with her scissors. He slides equally careful fingers through those longer strands over my forehead, and I could purr like Kitty. Or maybe like the cat Alice left in Dair’s safekeeping, safely at home on an island off Scotland’s mainland, that lucky feline.
His hands sink lower, like my heart wants to at the thought that I won’t get to witness that reunion. And that I won’t be around for him when everything he’s been through hits him. Because it will, like it hit me outside a storage cupboard.
I won’t be there to hold him through it like he did for me in my old bedroom. Won’t be able to give him the same comfort. At least Dair’s hands lowering to grasp at my biceps is a distraction from the urge roaring through me to hold him hostage. Or to heft him even higher and carry him to his bedroom, where I bet hissheets are still as warm and rumpled as he looks when he breaks our kiss to drag in a breath.
His eyes aren’t tired now. They’re dark and deep and wide enough to reflect me as Dair catches hold of my face with both hands. He angles it where he wants it like he did in front of a portrait, and there’s nothing sleepy about that action.
He’s wide awake and hungry for more.
So am I, and I’ve never let myself want that.Morewith other hookups meant risking what used to happen all too often in classrooms.
Dair knows everything about me. What I can do and what I can’t. He hasn’t laughed once. Fuck it. He looks at me like I’m some kind of hero.
It leaves me husky. “Happy I could help.” I get honest. “Just wish I could do it for longer.”
We’re kissing again then, with just a closed door between us and a group of men who would no doubt whoop if they saw me almost climb up on the counter with him. Dair hooks his legs around me, and I can’t help this need to get even closer. I lean in, and Dair’s head knocks against a cabinet, but his heels press even harder to the small of my back, telling me to keep going, and we’re grinding.
My hard-on aches, held back by my jeans. Dair’s pyjamas hold back fuck all. They’re tented, and only a new sound joining the rustle of tissue and pop of bubble wrap from the next room stops me from listening to the frantic orders my dick whispers.
Take him back to bed while you still can.
Exes roar with laughter. Not at me for wanting to bang Dair this badly. That isn’t even what I want most. I got a wild urge to bundle him back under his covers and curl up around him. Sling a heavy leg over his, maybe. Anything to keep him here.
More laughter erupts, and I have no idea what the joke is, but it is a reminder that we’re all here on a mission.
Getting off isn’t the end goal. Nor is us having a good long cuddle under his bedcovers. Getting Dair home ASAP is what he’s wanted from day one, and is still what he needs my help to make happen.
I back away, and he slides down from the counter, as pink as my chest was the very first time he touched it. “I’ll go get dressed.” He slips out of the kitchen to do that, and I can’t ignore that Dair will slip away for good tomorrow.
No prizes for guessing what I regret the most about that fact.
I’m the reason he’ll get to leave London early.
