The minutes tick by, way longer than smoking a cigarette takes, and I stand up, wondering if he decided to do something crazy again, like walk through a blizzard. I put my coat on and step outside. I don’t see him anywhere, and my heart starts to pound. Snow is coming down, but it’s not heavy. The lot and cars are covered, and the highway is silent and deserted. I scan the lot for the Blazer, which is hard since everything’s covered in snow.
Then I hear a scraping noise. I walk over toward it and see Ethan behind the Blazer, the trunk wide open, with one of those little fold-up shovels, frantically digging in the snow.
“Ethan, what are you doing?” I step out into snow that comes up nearly to my knees and shuffle through it toward him, my pants getting wet. It looks like he’s trying to dig out the car. “Ethan, stop.”
“We can’t stay here another night,” he growls angrily, turning to look at me with a red face and runny eyeliner. “We have to get back and get him. We have to.” He starts digging again.
“You’re not going to dig the car out.” I go over to him and grasp one of his arms, but he jerks it away from me. “Ethan, come on.”
He keeps digging, huffing and puffing in the cold.
This time, I grab both his arms and say firmly, “Ethan, stop. You’re going to get sick. Come on.” I take the shovel from him, fold it up, and put it back in the trunk of the Blazer.
I walk him back to the motel room, and once inside I brush snow from his hair and remove his coat. I shake the snow off it and drape it over the back of a chair to dry. I set him down on the bed and remove his shoes and socks. I get up to get a towel to dry off his clothes and feet. I find a couple of bags of tea with the coffee stuff and get the coffee pot going again.
Ethan stares at me, suspiciously, as I kneel in front of him and attempt to dry the melted snow off him with the towel.
“Are you okay?” I ask him.
He doesn’t answer me.
He leans forward and kisses me.
13
Ethan
January 8, 1994
Likes:
-Kissing Shane
-Seeing Shane
-Being with Shane
Dislikes:
-Not kissing Shane
-Not seeing Shane
-Not being with Shane
February 15th, 1994
All these Valentine’s Days have passed in my life without being with Shane and wanting to be with Shane. There have been what feels like hundreds, but I guess it’s only been fifteen.
Well.Wouldhave been fifteen.
When I got to my locker yesterday morning, there was a note waiting. It was on redpaper, cut into a heart. The message said, “Happy Valentine’s Day :)” and I knew by the handwriting it was from Shane. During 2nd period, I wrote him a note too and put it in his locker after class. I don’t usually see him until after 5th period, and he’ll walk with me to Spanish while he goes to Civics.
When I saw him, he asked me to meet him after school. He said he was going to take me home, and then pick me up after dinner. Ev was out on a date with his girl, so he wasn’t there when Shane came to get me. He’d told me to bundle up really good in some warm clothes, and when I got in the car, he had hot cocoa in a thermos.
I didn’t know where he was taking me or what to expect. He took me to the river, near the same place we were a couple months ago, when we first kissed. He parked and walked me over to a telescope that had been set up in the snow, pointed up at the clear night sky.
He told me he found it with all his grandparent’s junk in their house. It was practically brand new. I was so surprised and so happy. We looked at some constellations and I pointed out some to Shane and drank the hot cocoa to keep warm.
