“Well, I did have plans to torture you in front of our dear Nymiria, but it seems as though torturing you would be pointless. This betrayal of yours has caused us many, manyproblems Ovella.” The prince was now walking in Nymiria’s direction, but instead of speaking to her again, he looked at the guards holding her chains. “Take them both to the dungeons. They’ll stay there until Dorid and I can converge.”
Dorid let out a huff of a laugh, his face red with what Nymiria could only assume to be embarrassment. It was evident that, just like her, he hadn’t known of Desi’s dealings with Inasha.
Nymiria didn’t flinch when the guards jerked her away. There was no point in being afraid of anything here. They’d made it abundantly clear that killing her was out of the question, just as long as she kept quiet. And, at the time, she had absolutely nothing to say. She didn’t even want to look at any of them. The thought of how foolish they made her look was enough to make her sick.
She wasn’t sure that placing her in a cell with Desi was a good idea, but they did it anyway. Not that there were many options to choose from, the dungeons had always been crowded, usually housing five or six individuals in one cell.
Even as the guards left them to their own devices, Nymiria said nothing. She sat, chains coiled around her bare feet, and stared straight ahead. She could see Desi in her periphery, the woman now carrying an air of melancholy that made Nymiria want to laugh—not just laugh. She wanted to scream. Wanted to throw any object she could find in Desi’s direction, but the only thing within reach was the pile of human excrement in the corner of their cell.
Instead, she just sat and listened to Desi’s labored breaths. Years ago, Desi informed her of her fear of tight spaces, of being caged. Nymiria wasn’t sure if it was a lie or not—if Desi was just performing to keep Nymiria from attacking her. But when the young woman began to sob frantically and claw at her chest, Nymiria finally turned to her.
There was fear there, she assumed. And while she found it hard to believe anything that came from the woman at her side, Nymiria was not a monster.
She slowly moved her hand across the foot of space between them, taking a firm hold of the trembling hand that was still at Desi’s side and gave it a firm squeeze. “You are going to be fine.” Nymiria whispered. “It’s evident they hope to keep us both alive. You must control yourself.”
Desi shook her head, choking on sobs and uneven breaths. “Nymiria, I… I need to explain—”
“I don’t want to hear it.” She snapped. “I believe I’ve experienced enough betrayal to last a lifetime, Desi. Just let me sit with this.” She was still holding her hand. And though her anger was so immense she could have easily broken the woman’s fingers, she only stroked her palm with her thumb. Soothing her.
“You have every right to hate me.”
“I know.”
Silence fell again. Nymiria listened to the distant sounds of other prisoners bickering with one another. She could hear someone groaning in pain or hunger—perhaps both. She was a fool to believe that she’d never end up in this place again. Even more, a fool to have believed that the person that once cared for her in her lowest moments would have abandoned her in such a way.
During the weeks she spent in these dungeons, Nymiria saw and heard absolutely horrific things. People were beaten, humiliated, and worse. Either by one another or by the guards.
She was lucky that the worst she experienced was her mother barging into her cell, stripping her bare, and carving runes into her back. She was lucky that Aziel had tried to provide her with as much care and comfort as possible. The thought was sickening—knowing what he’d done to keep those he loved safe and Desi did this.
Still, Nymiria stroked her hand.
“I didn’t have a choice,” came a soft whisper. Nymiria went rigid at the words, a fresh ache pulling at her chest.
“Everyone has a choice, Desiree.”
There was a shuffling sound that finally drew Nymiria’s attention. She turned her head in Desi’s direction, somehow missing the warmth of their joined hands. “The only other choice I had was letting them hurt my brothers. They were all that I had, Nymiria. Aziel and Trio wereallthat I had.” She exclaimed quietly.
“After Owen died, allIhad wasyou!”
“You don’t think that I know that? You don’t think that I’ve had to sit with myself and live with what I’ve done for the last three years?”
“Three years?”Nymiria growled, seething.
Desi rose to her knees, clasping her hands together in front of herself. “Nymiria, they knew what Aziel, Trio, and Thorn were doing. Not because of me, but because there were Hunters that kept a close watch on Aziel. He’d disappear randomly during missions and each time he did, people in the camps would go missing.” She drew her knees to her chest, securing her arms around them before continuing. “Dorid was going to each Mystic servant and questioning them about what was happening, he even offered rewards to anyone who came forward with information. There were a few people that knew about Trio’s involvement and when I discovered that there was a bounty on my brother’s head, I offered myself up as an informant for clemency on his behalf. I didn’t want to do this, Nymiria, but I was left with no other choice. I never told themanythingincriminating. What your mother asked of me usually pertained to your personal matters, anyhow. It seemed as though she didn’t really care about what Aziel and Trio were doing. Knowingwhat I know now, I can understand why she didn’t care about Mystics being liberated.”
“All she cared about was whether or not you knew what you were and what your involvement with Aziel was. I told her basic things and Everand… well, he was involved, too. He wanted to know about your mating bond and while I didn’t have much information about you and Aziel, I just gave him basic information on how they worked. It seemed that your mother’s ultimate goal was keeping you separated from Aziel, knowing that if the two of you were to accept the bond, it would make both of you stronger. I don’t know how, she never specified.” When Nymiria didn’t speak, Desi released a long sigh, rubbing her hand over her eyes. “Your mother wanted you dead at first, but Everand convinced her to see another perspective—a future where you were not dead, but ruling alongside someone who had the same vision that your mother did. I was then told that my focus should be centered around finding Aziel’s weaknesses.”
Nymiria’s jaw flexed. She turned her face away from Desi, refusing to look at her. “So,youdid it.Youtold Everand that Aziel would take his own life if anything happened to me—youtold him about the bond piercings.Youtold him that Aziel and I were sharing a room, that we were involved.” She snapped. “You say that you tried to keep it as vague as possible, Des, but you told Everand just enough for him to know which angles to work. You told him just enough for him to know how to kill the very people you claim to love!”
“And?” Desi exclaimed. “How is what I’ve done any different from the things you did? I have never done anything to harm Trio and Aziel—youwere the one who killed the person you loved. WhatIdid was to keep themalive.”
It felt like a blow to the gut. Nymiria recoiled as if it had been, her face crumpling with horror. Even though there was immediate regret in the lines of Desi’s face, Nymiria didn’t care.“You think you are keeping them alive?” She scoffed. “Forgive me for being the bearer of bad news, Desiree, but Everand Alvaros is not a man that holds himself to any sort of agreement unless it benefits him. He will kill Trio. And because he is a god, he has the ability to kill Aziel, as well. And me. But I suppose that shouldn’t hurt you too much, considering I was nothing but a bargain to you anyway.”
“How can you dare sit there and insinuate that I didn’t care about you? I’ve spent the last decade by your side—caring for you, healing you, cleaning up your messes, and carrying you out of shady inns and brothels you had no business being in.Idid that. Not just because Aziel asked me to or because Owen asked me to. I did it because Iloveyou, Nymiria. As I said, you have every right to be angry at me for what I did, but we were all just trying to survive. We were all just trying to make sure that those we cared about lived to see another day.” Her breaths were rough, her eyes glistening with tears. “I never wanted to have to choose between any of you when it came to who I betrayed. I never wanted to betray anyone. But, believe me, I told Trio everything. He knew what I did and I did everything I could to make sure neither you, nor Aziel were harmed because of it. I risked my own life to not only funnel information to your mother, but to Trio, as well.”
She was still angry, but Desi was right. Nymiria had done far worse, for far less. “Trio knows?”
Desi nodded slowly, shoulders dropping. “Nym, I need to know if you want me to keep pretending to be loyal to Dorid or not. If I let them know that I am on your side, it could be…”
