“Yes. I think that constantly. And I feel…that is, since his mother is gone, I want to raise him well all the more. I’ll have help, of course, but a child should have his parents. Or at least one of them.”
Lark was impressed by Anthony’s maturity, under the circumstances. Prior to all this, Anthony had been lighthearted; he loved fun and mischief and seemed to have few cares in the world. He’d never seemed especially grounded or responsible. But he’d taken to fatherhood.
“I’m in awe of you,” Lark said.
“How so?”
“It would be easy for you to leave little Henry here in the arms of his nurse and return to your old life, but you’ve embraced being a father to this child. I admire that.”
“Thank you.”
Lark looked down at the baby again. He was fully asleep in Lark’s arms. And some voice Lark’s head whispered that, if he loved Anthony, then he’d have to love this little boy, too. Thatif they had a future together, then this child would be Lark’s, in a way. Maybe he was getting ahead of himself, but he’d need to think about whether this was what he wanted.
“He’s a sweet baby,” Lark said, handing him back to Anthony.
“Not always. Sometimes he screams like the world is ending and nothing will console him. He keeps Mrs. Church up at night. His nappies are among the foulest things I have ever smelled. You’re lucky. He must have just eaten and his need to nap overcame his fear of strangers. Or he likes the look of you. Can’t say I blame him.” Anthony winked and then laid the boy back down in his cradle.
Lark could see the future, somehow. Of Anthony and this boy playing together. Of Anthony teaching him manners or the things he needed to be a man. Of Anthony and Henry having a friendship of a sorts.
Would Lark be a part of that future? Could this little boy be Lark’s, too?
“You’re thinking very hard,” said Anthony.
“Would you want me to be a part of his life?” Lark asked, gesturing at Henry.
“Yes,” Anthony said without hesitation. “I thought about asking you to be his godfather.”
“Oh. Me?”
“I think it would depend a lot on the nature of our relationship, which is why I haven’t asked, but if you want to be a part of his life, then yes, I’d like for you to be his godfather.”
“If I am a part of your life, then I want to be a part of his, too.”
Anthony smiled. “Good. I’m glad for that. I’ve been so busy with Matilda’s affairs that I haven’t scheduled the christening yet, but I must do that soon, at least according to my mother. I want you to be there for that.”
“I will.”
Mrs. Church returned. Anthony gestured toward the door. “Perhaps we should let him sleep.”
As they walked back downstairs, Lark said, “I admit, all of this is a bit overwhelming and unexpected for me, just a fraction of what I’m sure it has been for you, but it’s not terrifying.”
A huff of laughter burst out of Anthony. “I’mterrified.”
“I just mean, I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want my relationship with you to be in the future, and it’s clear that if we’re part of each other’s lives, then I will get to know Henry.”
“Yes. That is why I wanted you to see him. See how you felt about it.”
“Honestly, my instinct is to gather all of you up and put you in my carriage and drive to Scotland where we can live anonymously on a farm far from other people, where no one would bother us. To the devil with London Society.”
“Believe me, I’ve had the same thought. But this is all new for you. You should take the time to think about what you want.”
“I will, truly.”
“Good.” Anthony led Lark into the sitting room. “Do you have plans tonight?”
“Not tonight. Tomorrow is the Atherton ball.”
“Yes. Lady Atherton sent me a personal note with her invitation, saying she’d very much like to see me. I suppose I shall put on my weeds and attend.”
