Put like that, Alison sounded like a total wimp. ‘I’m not running away,’ she said. ‘Not really.’
‘Oh. My mistake. Sorry.’
There was a short silence, then Rosie said, ‘Oh, come on, Ali, don’t be so daft. Get yourself back here and sort this out. Not tonight maybe, but tomorrow when you’ve slept and you’re feeling refreshed.’
‘What would be the point?’ Alison asked.
‘You love Mac. You know him!’
‘But I don’t, do I? That’s the trouble. He’s not what I thought at all.’
‘Yes, he is. You just have to believe in him.’
‘And what if I do believe in him and then he lets me down? What if it all goes wrong? How would I deal with the fallout then? I can’t go through what Lynne went through. It would break me.’
‘But that might never happen!’
‘Things go wrong,’ Alison cried. ‘Look at you and Craig. Twenty years you were with him. You gave up everything for him to move to Sheffield, away from your home and your family, and in the end it finished, and you had to come home and start again.’
‘So what?’ Rosie asked.
‘So what? Twenty years! You never married, never had children. All those years wasted.’
‘Not wasted. I loved him. He loved me. Why is it a waste when I have twenty years of happy memories to look back on?’
‘But… it ended. Don’t you regret it?’
Rosie was quiet for a moment, then she said, ‘Your marriage ended. Do you regret that? Allthoseyears wasted?’
Alison gasped. ‘How can you say that? Drew didn’t leave me! He, he…’
‘Died, Ali. Drew died. Because life’s a risk, and you two gambled and eventually you lost. But, oh my God, while you were winning, wasn’t it perfect? Wasn’t it bloody lovely and happy and wonderful? If you’d known he was going to die in his fifties, would you have said no to marrying him?’
Alison’s eyes were blurry with tears. ‘It’s not the same.’
‘It is, though. None of us have any idea what’s ahead. You didn’t know the Mac of yesterday. What he did then is none of your business. But who he is now, that’s the Mac you know and love, and you’re throwing him away – why? Because at some point in some mythical future he might let you down? He might get run over by a bus, too. So might you. Not in bloody Kelsea Sands because the buggers cancelled our service, but you know what I mean. You were so happy, Ali. Don’t let go of that happiness forwhat if. Grab hold of it. Hold on to it. Live it. Enjoy every bloody moment cos you never know when it will be over.’
‘I’ve got to go,’ Alison said weakly. ‘I need to get something to eat and then get an early night. I’m on the bakery shift tomorrow. At least I won’t have that awful commute.’
‘No, well, I’m sure that makes everything worthwhile then.’
‘I’m sorry, Rosie.’
There was a loud sigh. ‘No, love. I’m sorry. Sorry for you. I’ll leave you to it. I need to get ready for work anyway. Take care of yourself, won’t you?’
‘I will.’
‘And Ali?’
‘Yes?’
There was a pause, then Rosie said, ‘Me and Craig? I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.’
36
‘That’s two duck eggs and three hen’s eggs today. Not bad at all.’
Mac gazed down at the basket over his arm and nodded approvingly at the little haul, then rolled his eyes. Look at him, walking around like Little Red Riding Hood. Whoever would have believed it?
