She’d been going to invite him through to the living room. Make him a coffee. Even offer him some of her fried rice. Seeing the disgust on his face, she changed her mind. She wished she’d left him standing on the doorstep in the cold now.
‘Why are you being so selfish?’ he snapped. ‘You know how we’re fixed. It’s not easy, you know, both of us working with twins to look after.’
‘Except,’ she said coldly, ‘you don’t look after them, do you? You’re always at bloody work or some conference or meeting or whatever. Jenna palms them off on me whenever she can, but you’re even worse.’
‘Palms them off on you?’ He glared at her. ‘So she wasn’t lying then. You really do consider them a burden!’
‘I never said that. Stop twisting my words,’ she said crossly. ‘Are you going to calm down and talk about this sensibly?’
‘I’m perfectly calm. You know, we thought we were doing you a favour. After Drew died you were so miserable, and when the twins came along, we thought they’d be the perfect antidote for your depression?—’
‘My grief,’ she said flatly. ‘I think you’ll find it was grief, and the only antidote to that is time, not looking after other people’s kids.’
‘Your grandchildren,’ he reminded her, as if she needed reminding.
‘I’m aware of that, and I love them both to bits,’ she said. ‘That doesn’t mean I want my entire life to revolve around them. Surely you can see that? You clearly feel much the same way about them yourself.’
He puffed out his cheeks and shook his head. ‘Wow! You’re unbelievable. I’m working! I’m trying to build a better life for my family. Maybe that doesn’t mean much to you, given that you threw away a perfectly decent career to sponge off Drew?—’
‘I beg your pardon?’ Alison couldn’t believe he’d just said that. She stared at him, hardly able to comprehend that the son-in-law she’d always got on well with could say something so cruel. ‘Spongeoff him? What are you talking about?’
Joel’s lip curled. ‘You gave up your job to do what? Lounge about in the house while he drove himself into an early grave working to provide for you. How did you think he was going to make up the shortfall in your income, once you stopped teaching?’
‘It wasn’t like that at all!’ Alison’s eyes filled with tears, and she blinked them away angrily. She wasnotgoing to show any signs of weakness. ‘Drew and I talked about it. We’d made plans.’
‘Youmade plans, and he went along with them,’ Joel said scornfully. ‘He never liked letting you down, did he? You could have carried on working until you both retired. Instead, you quit your job, became a lady of leisure and let him work himself to death. Now you’re trying to do the same to your daughter. How’s she supposed to look after two kids and carry on working at the same time? Have you any idea how stressed she’s been lately because of this? Or maybe you’d prefer it if she quit her job, too, and let me struggle to cover all the bills and mortgage?’
Alison had no words. She thought back to the discussions she and Drew had had about her leaving work. He’d been all for it. Hadn’t he? He’d said they could easily manage on his salary, that she had no need to worry. He wanted her to be happy, he said.
Oh, God. Had she really driven him into an early grave?
‘I think you should go,’ she said shakily.
‘Truth hurts, doesn’t it?’ he said unkindly. ‘I’m glad you’re upset. Jenna’s been a mess for days, ringing round, organising after-school clubs and all sorts. Their gym club’s probably out of the question now if you won’t take them. Maybe the dance classes, too. We’re probably going to have to look for a nanny now. Jenna’s worn out trying to fix it all.’
‘And I’m sure you did your best to help her,’ she said sarcastically, knowing perfectly well that it would all have fallen on her daughter’s shoulders. She felt a sudden guilt and shame. She should have considered that. She’d just made more hard work for Jenna.
‘No wonder she doesn’t want to see you again,’ he snarled. ‘You really take the biscuit, you know that? Not an ounce of compassion for her. When I think how forgiving she was, even though she really struggled after her dad died, knowing it was all your fault he got ill?—’
‘It wasnotmy fault!’ Alison pushed him away from her in fury, and he staggered backward, not prepared. ‘How dare you say such a thing? He had cancer! I didn’t cause that.’
‘Cancer can be caused by stress. Everyone knows that. And his immune system was probably weakened by the extra work and the responsibility. But did Jenna ever have a go at you for it? No. She tried to get you through it all. She even trusted you with our babies, which is more than I would have done, considering the state you were in at the time.’
‘Get out, Joel,’ Alison said, unable to check the flow of tears now. She wanted him to leave because she hated the thought of him seeing how much he’d upset her. She didn’t want him to have that power. She pulled open the door, her emotions making her oblivious to the icy blast that swept through the hallway. ‘Leave, now.’
‘Don’t worry, I’m going. But I hope you’re prepared for the fact that you won’t be seeing the twins for a very long time.’
‘You can’t keep them away from me,’ she gasped. ‘They’re my granddaughters.’
‘Yes, when it suits you! If you’re not prepared to look after them when we need you then you’re not seeing them at all. Simple as. And don’t bother trying to harass Jenna about it because it was her decision. I’m just passing on the message.’
He pulled his coat tighter. ‘I hope you’re happy with yourself. You’ve really upset your daughter and now your granddaughters will be miserable, too. Nice work, Alison.’
The moment he stepped outside she slammed the door shut and dropped the latch, as well as sliding the chain across. For a moment she held her breath, half expecting him to try to get back inside, but she heard nothing until the front gate clicked shut, and a minute or so later his car started, and he drove away.
She leaned against the door, struggling for breath, her hands shaking. She couldn’t believe that she’d just had a showdown with Joel, of all people. They’d always got along fine. Did he and Jenna really believe she’d been responsible for Drew’s death? Is that what they’d thought all these years?
She staggered back into the living room and sank on to the sofa. She couldn’t stop trembling and felt as if she was in shock. What just happened?
