The arm I had squished between us went around behind him and landed at his waist. I felt him tense for a moment before his body went back to normal. He sank into me a bit, putting some of his weight on mine—not in a way that would hurt me, but as a grounding of sorts. Like he didn't want me to go anywhere.
And since I didn't want to move either, I would stick around as long as he'd let me.
Time passed as we stood there together, enjoying the way Ginger floated between us. Simon pulled some snacks from her bin attached to the front of the stall door and fed them to her, praising her about being a good girl and welcoming me.
We decided it was time to leave when my stomach began to grumble again. I was highly embarrassed at how my hungerlevels had changed. Why did it seem like I was starving, and what in the world was it going to take for me to just chill out? Simon was going to think I was a needy mess at this rate—though so far he hadn't complained. I didn't want to risk it.
"We should probably get you a snack before we keep on. I did promise to take you all the way around the ranch so you could see people."
I shrugged. "It's not like I won't see them later, too, though a snack would be nice. I won't lie."
Simon checked on a few things with Ginger to make sure she was okay and had enough food and drink before turning me back toward the house. He left me on the porch as he grabbed snacks for us, and then he fulfilled his promise of walking me around.
As we greeted all the different men and spoke with everyone, they all seemed happy to have me around. There wasn't a single complaint, nor was there any judgment. I did see a few coy glances thrown Simon's way, but I had to suspect that it was because he was taking the initiative to help me.
No one else had—at least not that I expected them to. I showed up unannounced. People didn't have to bend over backwards for me. That wasn't the way.
At the same time, I wanted to take his help for more than it was. I wanted him to want me, and if that was as my Daddy, then that would be great.
It'd be a dream come true.
CHAPTER
EIGHT
Simon
Sean caught up to us during the tour of the grounds. He animatedly told us about how his day had gone. Apparently the animals were giving him a rough time, despite him being his normal bubbly self. He couldn't understand what it was that made them think they could have a field day at his expense.
I doubted Sean believed any of what he was saying, really. It was more like he was putting on a performance for Tanner's sake, which I appreciated because my boy giggled and laughed his heart out as we walked around.
When I noticed the two of them sharing secretive looks, I decided I should dip out and give them time to hang out alone. Did I want to do that? No, not really, but they deserved some privacy considering I wasn't going to let them spend the evening alone in the main house—not unless Atticus himself told me not to come.
The rule, at least since I had been at the ranch, was that if the porch light was on, then you were welcome to come inside the main house. If it was off, well then the happy couple wanted some privacy. I always thought of it like the old sock on thedoorknob trick people used in their younger years when you had roommates.
At first I wondered why they would be so forthcoming about their sex life, after a conversation with Cory one day, I realized it wasn't always about sex. He told me that when Sean was overwhelmed or Atticus was grieving deeply, they would sometimes turn off the light as well. It was simply meant to be only between the two of them.
My respect for the couple bloomed after that. Knowing the boundaries you needed to create while still having a warm and welcoming atmosphere was magical. It was something I'd never seen before, yet they'd crafted it so perfectly.
My hope was that the light would be on today. I wanted the chance to sit with Tanner more. Watching him sleep for that half hour earlier had solidified my belief that he was mine. I needed to get him used to me. I needed to learn all about him so that when it came time for us to be together fully, I could provide all his needs.
So caught up in my thoughts, I nearly ran into Griffin.
"Oh crap, I'm sorry," I said as I took a giant step back.
He laughed, shaking his head. "It's no big deal. You seem distracted. Is everything okay?"
The question was pointed. He wasn't only asking if I was okay. He wanted to know about Tanner too. We had come by earlier but looks could be deceiving.
"You seem to be close with him," Griffin added when I didn't immediately speak.
I shrugged. "It's not that I'm necessarily closer with him than anyone else. I think having me as the person he saw first kind of put me in a position that others weren't."
"Is that the only thing putting you in that position or is your interest also part of it?" he asked.
I snorted. "Yeah, you've got me pegged there, bud. Of course I have a vested interest in Tanner, but he truly is doing better. I can tell being here is already helping him. He's with Sean now. They wanted to talk and mingle amongst themselves without being interrupted, I guess."
Griffin rocked back on his heels as he pulled his coat tighter. Wind whipped around us, bringing up snow flurries and dusting us in white. Being still made the cold all that more noticeable. Yet still I didn't immediately take off.
