She huffs. “Hmm, well, I feel like fine is not actually how you feel,” June says.
I snort. “I’m a little creeped out by how you know that.”
“Girl,” June says.
“Cooper asked me out by buying me flowers from my own shop.” I rush out.
June is silent for a second. “My cousin works fast,” she says as if to herself. “So how do you feel about that?” she asks.
“I don’t know what to do, and you saw with your own eyes how it went with Jacob. It’s not like we had a long relationship, so it didn’t hurt as much, but what’s wrong with me? Why does this keep happening? Is it going to happen with Cooper? What if I hurt him and I don’t mean to? What am I supposed to do with all of that? What if they aren’t the problem and it’s me?And—”
“Okay, I’m going to need you to take a breath,” June says.
I listen, inhaling deeply and try to slow my quickly beating heart.
“Next, I think you’re overthinking it. Which I totally understand, and you have every reason to consider these things. But to me, you just sound scared to say yes.”
I jerk away from the phone as if it burned me.
Is she right? Am I scared to say yes? But why would I be scared? I don’t know Cooper.
“Hello?” June says.
“I’m here,” I rasp.
“You barely knew Jacob, and what happened hurt you. I’m sorry about that, I really am, but Cooper is not remotely similar to Jacob.”
“I know.” I confide.
“So then why are you so scared?” she asks again.
“I think I’m my own worst enemy,” I mumble.
June laughs. “Girl, we all are. I think you should say yes. He was asking about you the other day. I mean, we’re all adults, y’all can be honest with each other if it doesn’t work out.”
“I made a pros and cons list to decide,” I say.
She snorts. “What was the result of the list?” she asks.
I know it was silly, but I didn’t know what else to do except wait for God to give me a sign, but the problem is. If I was given a sign, I’d probably look right past it and think,oh no, that’s not for me.I can be dense that way. I know that.
“The pros win,” I mumble, ignoring her amusement.
June laughs out loud this time. “I’m so sorry, that’s not funny,” she says, still laughing.
“It’s kind of funny,” I say.
“It actually is, but I think you also know what it means.”
“I do,” I mumble. Since I woke up this morning, Cooper has been on my mind.
“I was supposed to take a break from all of this,” I tell her.
“Yes, well, we can plan until the cows come home, but then life happens.”
I snort and look out the window. The sun is shining, and the flowers are blooming.
It won’t make or break me to go on one date with Cooper.
