He kissed me again and slapped my bottom. “I like these jeans,” he murmured.
I whimpered and pressed my face into his neck, taking a deep inhale to drag the intoxicating scent of him into my lungs. “Okay, enough. I need food,” I said.
He chuckled. “Right this way.”
Noah was already at the table, his legs swinging as he ate ahash brown. “Miss Julia, Uncle Marcus got a lot of food so you can eat too.”
“That was so nice of him.” I took the chair across from him, and Marcus handed me a sandwich and a large coffee. He grabbed sugar from the cabinet and cream from the fridge and then sat down at the table with us.
We ate breakfast together, like a domestic unit, and the moment stirred emotion inside me. I used to believe I never wanted this life, but sitting and talking with Marcus and Noah as we ate breakfast changed my perspective. I wouldn’t mind doing this every Sunday morning.
The funniest part was, Marcus and I didn’t have to say much. Noah dominated the conversation with factoids and lots of questions. Watching them together was also very sweet. They had an easy affection between them, and Marcus was patient and loving with Noah, alternating between answering his questions and asking questions of his own. He wiped crumbs from the boy’s mouth and showed such gentleness that a dangerous yearning tightened my chest.
Maybe I wanted this life after all. Or maybe it wasn’t that I necessarily wanted a family as much as I wantedthisfamily. I had fallen for both Marcus and Noah and wanted to be a part of their lives in a substantial way.
I finished my food and helped Marcus clear the table. I was reluctant to leave, but I needed to take a shower and had to go home at some point.
Noah plopped down on the sofa to watch cartoons, and Marcus walked me to the door.
“Last night was amazing,” he said in a low voice, cupping my jaw and looking deeply into my eyes. “I want to see you again. I want to keep seeing you.”
“You’re really different, you know that?”
“How?”
“You wouldn’t believe how much men play games and don’t say exactly what they want. But you’re direct, and I appreciate it.”
“I don’t want there to be any confusion about what I’m looking for. So what do you think? You and me...?”
“You’ve been direct with me, so I’ll be direct with you. Yes, I’m definitely interested, and I want to see where this can go.” I placed a hand on his chest. “You’re nothing like I thought, Marcus. When I first met you, I assumed you were a player. The Romeo license plate tipped me off. But now that I’ve gotten to know you better, there’s a little bit of Romeo—yes—but there’s quite a bit of Batman and Marcus too. A nice blend of all three.”
“Human beings are complex.”
“Yes, we are,” I agreed.
His thumb stroked my cheek. “You’re okay with group dates for a while?”
“I am. Just call me.”
I lifted onto my toes and kissed him briefly. Then I peered around him to catch sight of Noah. “Bye-bye, Noah.”
He jumped off the sofa and ran over, his bare feet slapping on the hardwood floor. I bent down and gave him a hug and kissed the top of his head.
“Bye,” he said, gazing up at me and waving.
I left the two of them in the doorway. The elevator ride down felt endless, and my insides felt as if they were being torn apart. I used to say I didn’t want to be a mother, but now I could see myself being a surrogate mother, at least. Little Noah had stolen my heart, the same way his godfather did.
I drove home with the radio on, singing at the top of my lungs so I wouldn’t be consumed by my thoughts. When I entered my apartment, the silence hit me. Leanne and the girls had already left. There were no toys scattered on thefloor, and I couldn’t hear the distant sound of children’s laughter.
The silence had never been this loud.
I found a note from her on the table behind the sofa.
Thanks for everything. I guess the date went well? Call me. I want all the details!
I replaced the piece of paper on the table and stood in my pristine living room with everything in its place. I was completely alone. I almost turned around and ran back to Noah and Marcus, where they were both probably sitting on the sofa watching cartoons.
The two of them had changed my outlook on life and reshaped my expectations for the future. I no longer pictured myself as a woman alone in her apartment. I wanted the chaos of family—the noise, the mess, and the kind of love that ran deeply.
