Theo groaned.“I don’t fucking know why you’re even doing this.You’re clearly hungry, I’m clearly here, able, and willing to let you drink my blood, and I can damn well eat after.”
“I’m not that hungry.”
That made Theo cackle in what he immediately realized was an unflattering way, and still he was unable to stop himself.“Bullshit.”
Peter forced a smile.“If you insist.Yes, I am hungry, but I will not fall upon you first thing through the door of our home.Not when we need to speak, not when I need to make sure you hear me.”
Theo raised his hands defensively.“We really don’t have to talk.At all.It’s fine.”
The wood of the chair creaked where Peter was still holding it out for Theo.“I believe that you literally do not mean that.”
And in the same way the wooden back of the chair was about to give in, something in Theo did.Suddenly tears were filling his eyes, and his lungs constricted.He loathed himself for how that made him weak in the moment instead of allowing him to stand his ground, and all of it over nothing.
The worst part of it was that Peter saw.Theo saw him see, watched as Peter’s eyes widened with shock.A heartbeat later, he was there, closing his arms around Theo.
“Beloved, I’m here.I’m sorry.Forgive me, but let me explain.Theodore, I never meant to hurt you.”
Theo already knew that.You always wanted to be kind, that’s why you took care of me, but I can’t—I can’t—
All of a sudden, Theo didn’t know anymore.
Peter kissed the crown of his head.“I shouldn’t have told you my feelings when you would think I was only doing it to get you to do what I wanted.I know you’re too stubborn for that, Theodore.And I will never allow another male cook into our house, never.”
“Huh?”Theo looked up from where he’d pressed his crying face to Peter’s chest for the second time that day.“What’s with the cook?”
“He won’t come here again.I realized why you wanted the cock-lock clause in our contract finally, and it will not happen again.”
Theo was just about confused enough that he stopped crying.“What?What does the cook—I just asked you that because I was being an ass.I was trying to push you.You’re always doing all these things for me.”He held up his bag, in which the contents of his lunch box were probably anything but edible at this point.“You carve cheerful messages into banana skin.Who does that?”
Peter looked annoyed.“Someone who cares about you.I wanted you to smile when you ate your food.”
“You could’ve just said you wanted me to think of your cock when I licked that banana.”
Peter considered that.“It wasn’t what I had in mind.I wanted you to smile because I did something nice.”
And that right there was the scary thing to Theo.“Well…just lie about it, then!”
Peter looked confused now.“Why though?I simply wanted you to smile.Why would I lie about that?”
“Because it’s scary.”Theo pushed away from Peter, who let him go.He felt his heart race as he opened his mouth again, not sure what would come out.“Bernard pretended to care and to… He pretended all sorts of things and…” Theo saw the shock on Peter’s face, but he couldn’t stop now.“…I couldn’t leave.Before I knew it, I had no money, no friends left, and…there was so much I didn’t remember.”His voice had gone whisper silent, and his tears were flowing freely.Standing was too much, and he sagged to his knees.“When you—if you—if I stop paying attention like I did back then, and I don’t realize it’s happening again, I…I don’t know I’ll be able to start over again.”
He couldn’t lift his head to look Peter in the eye.It was entirely possible that this was it, that they were breaking up what relationship they had today, and Theo would be fine.He’d known, in some dark part of him, that he was the problem, had always been the problem.I’m just not made to be with other people.I never should’ve tried.I should’ve stuck with being Puck.It would’ve made my life easier.
“Theodore,” Peter said, only this time, Theo never wanted him to stop saying his name like that.“How could I ever repeat any part of what he did to you when I love you?”
Theo shook his head.“No.No, don’t say that.I don’t want to hear it.”
“I ask that you do.I love you and have for…oh, almost since the moment we met.Maybe not quite.Very soon after, though.”
“Love doesn’t work like that.”
Peter sighed.“You’re right that it shouldn’t.I assume Frey and Freya conspired to create a mead made of lust and love in equal parts.”
Theo blinked until he could see through the tears and dared a look up.“Who?”
Peter gave him this absolutely scary, glorious smile.“Just a pair of Viking gods.Although it’s still culturally inaccurate, and grossly so.”He held out his hand.“I would love you from sunrise to sunset, moonrise to moonset.Please, Theodore, will you allow that?I ask nothing in return, not a thing.”
Theo didn’t take the offered hand, just looked away again.He was feeling miserable.Guilty.Like a liar.Like a house built on unsteady ground, he collapsed in on himself, coiling his shoulders inward to his chest and hugging himself until he was all but a ball on the floor, hoping to vanish.
