He didn’t slow down long enough to hear Tanner’s reply as he headed up the stairs because the temptation to return tothe living room and ask for a goodnight hug was too powerful. Instead, he stumbled into his bedroom, his head filled with confusing thoughts, trying to convince himself it was neither lust nor want he’d seen in Tanner’s expression only a few minutes ago. He was unable to entirely rid himself of the urge to go back downstairs to hug Tanner, but he didn’t leave his bedroom either.
Chapter 9
Tanner had settled into a nice routine, now that he was hanging out with Lance every day. After work, usually around 6:00 or 7:00 p.m., Tanner drove to Lance’s house for dinner. Both had simple tastes, so they managed to cook basic, hearty meals. Plus, Lance really knew his way around a grill, so it was no hardship for Tanner to pick up steaks and potatoes routinely on the way home from work. After dinner, they’d play some video games, watch movies, or just sit around and talk until it was time for bed. Then Tanner would make up the couch and slip into blissful sleep. He’d wake at dawn and head back to his apartment to get ready for work, feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. He felt so much better about—well, everything.
It wasn’t just that though—their routine felt more like a relationship than a casual arrangement, and sometimes, Tanner had to remind himself they weren’t actuallytogether together.It was the fucking oddest thing. He’d come home to Lance cooking something on the stove or on the grill and feel an almost irresistible urge to wrap his arms around him. Or sometimes, when they watched TV together, Lance would move closer to him, and point out a detail in the movie, and Tanner could swear Lance was deliberately touching him as much as possible. Brushing elbows, leaning shoulder-to-shoulder, or sometimes he’d even pet the back of Tanner’s head distractedly, as if unaware of his actions. And every night, without fail, it was becoming increasingly difficult to bid each other a simple goodnight. Even Lance, a self-professed old man who loved his early nights, kept delaying their goodnights until later and later.
“So, Tanner, I have this niece named Evelyn. Lovely girl. She’s a nurse at the hospital. I could give you her phone number, if you wanted,” said Melissa, one of the secretaries at the office.
She was a lovely woman in her 60s. She dyed her curly hair bright red and loved wearing purple. Tanner had never bothered talking to her before, but now that he felt much more human and had begun enjoying mindless chatter in the morning, he found Melissa’s morning debriefing entertaining. Now every day when Tanner dropped by her desk for his stack of client files, she was only too happy to share her evening plans and tell him all about her single and very available nieces.
“You’re too kind, Melissa, but I’m already seeing someone,” he reminded her.
It was a boldfaced lie. He was definitely not back in the dating game, but she didn’t need to know that. But of course, there is no rest for the wicked and, as luck would have it—Mark walked in the door just then.
“That’s really too bad,” Melissa replied. She pointed her purple daisy pen at him. “If you change your mind, I’ve got her number right here in my phone,” she said with a wink. She dropped several files on the reception counter—the real reason he had stopped by her desk—and Tanner picked them up with a smile and a quick thanks.
“You heading out?” Mark asked, as Tanner turned around. Mark always wore the same style of clothing every day. Dark slacks and pastel-colored shirts. He even got the same haircut once a month at the barber shop. Respectable, drab, and the very image of the stereotypical office drone. Tanner couldn’t help but wonder if that would be his fashion destiny as well if he stayed in this job.
“Yeah, I have three contracts to get signed today,” Tanner said, shuffling the files with his right hand while keeping them tucked in the crook of his left arm. His doctor had finally givenhim medical clearance to remove the sling and start some light exercises.
“So, you’re dating someone now?” Mark asked with raised brows.
Shit. Tanner looked back at Melissa who was sitting right there listening to every word.
“Uh, yeah,” he replied, hoping Mark would read the lie in his eyes but not call him out on it.
“That explains it then,” he said, and it was so far from the response Tanner had expected that he startled and almost dropped his files. “Cameron went by your place yesterday to give you some muffins, and you weren’t there. She went a little crazy trying to figure out why you weren’t home and where you might be,” he said, chuckling in amusement at Cameron’s stalking habit. Tanner found that trait to be thoroughly irritating, but he kept that to himself. “Don’t worry, I convinced her not toabuseher power and track you.”
“Thanks,” Tanner said with a pained smile, rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably.
“I’m happy for you!” Mark said, giving him a congratulatory pat on his back. “You look much better. Clearly, whoever she is, she’s good for you!”
Tanner wanted to laugh at that. Ha! If they only knew it wasn’t a she—but dating or not, Lancewasdoing him a world of good. There was no denying that he felt like a new man.
Tanner couldn’t see any way out of his web of lies, so he resigned himself to just playing along.
“Right, yeah—thanks!” he replied, mustering up as much enthusiasm as possible.
Mark waved him out the door and wished him luck with his meetings.
After work, Tanner headed towards Lance’s place with two foil-wrapped subs on his back seat. They had no formal plans for the evening, although Tanner had thought about working on a home repair project when a call came in from Lance.
“Billy Bob's Barbecue and Crematorium, you kill 'em, we grill 'em,” Tanner said cheerfully, as he picked up. He expected Lance to quickly respond with something equally ludicrous, like he always did these days. Instead, there was a long pause before Lance spoke.
“Hey, Tanner. I wanted to let you know that my brother was in a car accident this afternoon. He’ll be fine, but I have to go see him. Couch is yours. The front door is unlocked. I don’t know when I’ll be—”
Tanner cut him off and said, “I’ll be in your driveway in about 30 seconds. Lock up. I’ll drive.” He hoped his no-nonsense tone would make his wishes perfectly clear.
“Not necessary. Really. It’ll take—”
“I’ll drive,” he repeated, cutting him off again.
Lance sighed loudly, making Tanner briefly regret putting up a fight. Maybe Lance really didn’t want him around. Maybe Lance liked being alone when confronted with difficult situations. Just as Tanner was about to apologize and rescind his offer, Lance suddenly reversed his position.
“Okay, T. Thanks.”
Lance was standing on his porch as Tanner pulled up, his face pale and serious, eyebrows pinched together, as he clutched the porch rail. By the time the truck came to a halt, Lance was grabbing the handle to the passenger door and jumping in, tossing his duffle bag in the back seat.
