“I’m gonna need to get another jersey!” Anna said from beside me, and I couldn’t help but feel absolute joy at this blessing.
Two babies.James would have been thrilled.
A tear leaked from my eye and trailed down my cheek. My mom caught it with her finger and then leaned her forehead to my shoulder as if knowing my thoughts.
“Okay, you want to know both genders? I have a clear shot right now?” the tech asked.
I nodded.
“Baby A is a boy.” She pointed to a blob on the screen, and Anna pumped her fist in the air.
“And Baby B is a girl.” She pointed to another blob, and my mom yipped in excitement.
A boy and a girl. Wow.
“Thank you,” I told the woman.
She printed some pictures and then left the room, telling me to take my time cleaning up.
“Twins!” Anna shook my arm. “This is amazing.”
I nodded. It was. But I was also feeling overwhelmed.How was I going to do this alone? Two babies. One parent. I wanted to cry.
I peered at my mom to see her wearing her deep-thinking face.
“Tell me what you’re thinking. Don’t hold back. I can take it.” I told her.
She nodded. “I’m thinking that raising two babies alone is a lot to take on. I know you’re capable of anything, but I want to either have you move to France with me for a year, or I’ll say no to the book deal and move to the farm with you.”
“Oh, Mom.” I burst into tears because a silent panic attack at doing this alone had been building inside of me, and my mother’s words had brought great relief. Twins were a lot, and without James to help with middle-of-the-night diaper changes and feedings, I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.
We hugged, and I told her I would think about it.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Seth
Today was the anniversary of Scarlett’s and our unborn child’s deaths. It was a depressing day for me, even though I’d made peace with what had happened. The date always jumped out of the calendar and made a pit form in my stomach.
I was in the upper portion of our grazing pasture as I herded some cattle with Russel and awaited a text from Ella to tell me the sex of her baby. Her mom and her best friend were in town, and I’d given her a couple days off so that she could visit with them. She seemed happier when they were here, and that made me happy. Since the night she’d come over to thank Maggie and me for leading her back to God, there had been a change in her. There was a pep in her step. I wasn’t worried about her anymore.
When my phone binged with the group text, I nearly fell off my horse.
Ella:So… it’s a girl and a boy. TWINS!
I hadn’t been expecting that. Twins? How could that be? Wouldn’t they have seen it at the first ultrasound? I guessed not.
Maggie:Oh, Praise God! What amazing little blessings.
Of course it was a blessing, but I also worried about Ella taking care of twins alone. I wanted to ask her to move in with me and live in the guest room so I could help her with the night feedings, but I knew that was crazy. I felt like Ella was mine, but she wasn’t. Would God let me fall in love with a woman I couldn’t have? I hoped not.
I shot off a reply.
Seth:Congrats! What an amazing surprise. I’ll have to start paying you in diapers.
She laughed at my response, but I still felt unsettled. I bid Russel goodbye and led my work gelding named Comet over to the nearby creek that ran through the north end of my property. When I got there, I tied Comet up in the shade and then sat at the edge of the creek, listening to the running water.
Twins. I grinned.
