The cold beer churned in my stomach, and I put it on the coffee table, only halffinished. Wracking my brain, I tried to figure out what made her react like that.
“Eric. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to just run away but you took me by surprise. Actually you freakin’ floored me.”
She was dressed and ready to go. Even wearing makeup. If I didn’t hear her crying in the bathroom I wouldn’t have known she was upset at all. At least until I looked closer, her eyes were red-rimmed, she hadn’t been able to cover it up. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“You didn’t.” She must have seen the look on my face and shrugged. “Okay, maybe you did a little. Like I said I didn’t expect it. I don’t use those words lightly.”
“Neither do I. Is that what you think? That I tell every woman I’m with ‘I love you’? Because I fuckin’ don’t.”
“But you have right? Told someone you loved them?”
Shit. Why did those three fucking words always cause so God damned much trouble? “Yes, I did. To a girl I cared about in high school. She totally screwed me over and broke my heart, or I thought she did. Butyou showed me what real love feels like.” She still hadn’t moved, hadn’t come to me, and I didn’t know what the fuck to do. I meant what I said, I did love her. Why couldn’t she see it?
“I’m sorry. You really did surprise me,” she said, and sat next to me on the couch. Taking my hand, she laced her fingers with mine. My hand was sweaty, my heart beating overtime wondering what was going on, but her fingers were ice cold, kind of surprising since she’d just gotten out of the shower. Tears welled in her eyes again and sucking in a breath I was about to tell her to forget I’d said anything. Maybe it was too soon? “So what now? Are you’re going to break up with me because I love you? I’m sorry I fucking said it.” More tears. Fucking leaky women. Seriously? Did it have to be part of their genes?
“No baby, I’m not going anywhere. I’m really, really sorry I overreacted.” The words were barely out of her mouth when she threw herself into my arms. Thank God I was sitting down because she took me by surprise. Women are so fucking confusing, someone really needs to write a damn manual or something. Maybe an app?
Mascara or something black left a trail down her cheeks as she rested her head on my shoulder. “Are you okay? Is there something I need to know, babe? I mean I expected a reaction but sure as fuck not that one.”
A little snot bubble popped at the end of her nose and I handed her the box of tissues. Still sitting in my lap, her body warmed as she cuddled with me. It seemed like the worst was over but I was still fucking confused. Was she happy, sad, scared, or did I screw the pooch?
“Better?”
“Yes, thank you.”
Her eyelashes were matted together from her tears and whatever make-up she didn’t cry off, and she had two black streaks on her face. Did I care? Hell no. She was beautiful, and hopefully all mine. The jury was still out on that one though. Fuck me running. Why the hell were relationships so complicated?
“Can you tell me what’s going on?”
“I’ll try.”
“Do you need a little time? I can take a shower if you want?”
“You don’t mind?”
“Babe, I love you. Whether you’re ready to hear it or not, it’s how I feel. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So yeah, I can give you ten minutes to figure shit out while I shower. Just don’t run away.”
“I won’t. I promise,” she replied with a tiny smile. It wasn’t much but it was more than she’d given me before and some of the pressure in my chest eased.
The shower helped ease more of the tension in my shoulders, but it also washed away her scent. I loved the smell of her sex. Spicy, silky goodness. The marks on my wrists were gone too. To look at us you’d never know we spent the afternoon burning up the fucking bed.
She was sitting on the sofa texting when I came out from my shower. It had been so good ‘til I opened my fucking mouth. How could it have gone from amazing to fucking suckful so fast?
“Everything okay?” Whoever she was texting had her attention because she jumped when she heard me.
“Uh, yeah. Everything’s fine. Cyn texted to say they would meet us downstairs in about twenty minutes. They just got back from shopping with Candy and Sweets.”
“Gotcha. Okay so that gives us a little more time.”
“I’m really sorry I overreacted.”
“It’s okay. I probably would have done the same thing if you said it first.”
“Really?”
“Nah, I’m trying to help.” She laughed, really laughed—like my Michelle. “Did you figure shit out?”
“I think so.”
