His expression softens, though the shadows remain in his eyes. “Probably. But I know she’ll be amazing and handle it like a boss. I just…” His shoulders stiffen, and his jaw tightens as he stares longingly at their wedding photo on his bookshelf.
“You just, what?” I sink into the chair across from him.
He hesitates, then lets out a shaky laugh. “I’m terrified, Kieran.”
“Of what?”
“Of becoming a father.”
I blink, surprised at the honesty.
Ronan doesn’t usually admit fear, not just to me but to anyone.
“You’ll be fine,” I say automatically, but he shakes his head
“You don’t know that. I’ve spent my whole life preparing to run this family, making decisions that affect everyone else. But this? Raising kids? That’s not something I can control. What if I screw it up?”
His vulnerability unsettles me.
He’s always been the strong one, and the cracks in his armor make me unsteady.
“Ciara will pick up the slack, so I wouldn’t worry.”
“I think worrying comes with the territory of being a parent. You’ll understand what it’s like one day.”
One day.
“I don’t know if I even want kids.”
“Seriously?”
“I mean, I do want them, I guess. But I’m not sure I’d be a good dad. I’m terrified I would just fuck up their life, so maybe it’s better not to take the risk at all.”
Ronan studies me, his gaze steady. “That fear? It’s natural. Everyone feels it. But it doesn’t mean you’ll be a bad father. It just means you care enough to worry about the responsibility.”
“Maybe.” I lean back and stare at the ceiling. “But what if I never stop feeling like this? What if I’m never ready?”
He shakes his head. “You will be. When the time’s right, it’ll feel different. You’ll see.”
I want to believe him. I really do. But deep down, I’m not convinced.
The fear feels too big, too rooted, like something that will never go away. And the worst part? As much as I want to believe in the future and the happy ending, right now all I can feel is the ghost of Cormac’s betrayal looming over us all.
One way or another, I’m going to figure out what the fuck he’s playing at, and when I do, he’ll regret the day he decided to stab us in the back.
Chapter Three
RILEY
I hoveroutside Ronan’s office, the wood of the door cool beneath my fingertips as I lean closer. I hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but when Kieran’s voice cut through the heavy silence of the hallway, I couldn’t help but listen.
And now I wish I hadn’t.
I don’t know if I even want kids.
The words are sharp enough to steal my breath, and my stomach turns violently.
How the hell am I supposed to tell him now?
