The small gesture makes my stomach sink.
“That this pregnancy has gone by quickly.”
“Oh, yeah, it’s been a real walk in the park.” When he catches my eye, he subtly shakes his head. “Are you expecting?”
I swallow hard as I try to hold back the tears. “Yeah… It’s my first baby.”
“Oh, congratulations!” the woman says, her eyes bright. “How far along are you?”
I hesitate as my stomach twists. “Only a few weeks.”
“It’s scary at first, isn’t it? All the waiting and wondering?” the husband says. “But babies are so much stronger than we give them credit for.”
It’s as if he can read the unspoken words on my face.
I force a small, tight smile.
“I hope so,” I whisper, chest tightening.
Before they can ask any more questions, the nurse calls out my name, and my stomach flips violently as I get to my feet.
I follow her down the hall to Dr. Rogers’ office.
He’s already sitting on a stool beside the examination table, prepping the ultrasound machine.
The sight of it has me swaying on my feet, and I have to grip the doorway to stop from keeling over.
“Riley?” Dr. Rogers immediately gets to his feet. “Is everything okay? Are you feeling faint?”
“I, uh…” I glance at the ultrasound machine, and my mouth fills with saliva.
“Nurse, could you get Mrs. O’Connor a glass of water?”
Dr. Rogers takes me by the elbow and leads me over to the examination table, forcing me to sit on the edge. “Take a breath.”
“Sorry. It’s just nerves.”
“That’s perfectly normal.”
The nurse appears with a cup of water and hands it to me.
I take a few tentative sips as Dr. Rogers sits back down on his stool and starts pressing buttons on the machine.
“Besides being nervous, how else are you feeling?” he asks.
“I don’t mean to be disrespectful, but can we find out if my baby has a heartbeat or not? Because I’m really freaking out here.”
Dr. Rogers offers me a patient smile that doesn’t ease my nerves in the slightest.
“Of course. Well, I got the results from your bloodwork back, and your hCG levels are still doubling, which is encouraging. But to be certain, I’ll need to perform another ultrasound to check the heartbeat. I had another machine brought in, which is a bit more advanced, so it should give us a clearer picture of what’s going on. If you want to get yourself situated on the table, we can get started.”
Dr. Rogers pulls the curtain around the bed so I can change into a gown. I hurriedly pull off my leggings and almost trip over the waistband when I step out of them in my hurry to change because it feels like I’m carrying a ticking time bomb.
I just want to know if my baby is okay or not. The hCG levels should be encouraging, but I’ve read countless stories where women’s bodies thought they were pregnant and continued producing all of the correct hormones when, in reality they had miscarried.
God, I wish Kieran were here.
When I pull back the curtain, I’m noticeably crying, but Dr. Rogers doesn’t look fazed.
