It’s alien, and intense, and leaves me trembling like a fool.
Evan’s shoulder brushes my arm, and sweet cherries are all I can smell. My heart pounds in my chest, and I don’t even think it’s from the gaping hole in my hand.
“You should see your pack doctor.”
“I’ll be fine.”
He tilts his head to look up at me. “Tetanus is serious.”
“We’re wolves, I’ll heal.”
“Doesn’t mean we’re invincible,” he sighs heavily as his thumb starts to drag over my knuckles tenderly, and a small, unexpected breath of satisfaction escapes me. “You don’t have to act so tough all the time.”
And I know he’s not just talking about today.
My eyes lock onto the sweeping motion he’s still doing with his thumb, and I’m stuck in a trance at the solace that holds me hostage. The touch of a mate is unlike anything I’ve ever felt. Pain doesn’t exist when he’s holding me.
It makes me feel seen, and I grit my teeth at the thought, breathing deeply through my nose as we remain in silence until the bleeding eventually stops. I glance at him out of the corner ofmy eye. His brows are slightly pinched as if he’s concerned, but trying to hide it.
He could have left; he could have turned his back on me. The Goddess knows I deserve it after the way I’ve treated him, yet he’s still here. Right by my side, without any indication that he’s planning on letting me deal with this alone.
My eyes shut tightly as my chest rises and falls, trying my hardest to calm myself in his presence, and in the knowledge that his soul is pure and gentle. He’s fucking with my head.
“Does it feel better?”
“What?”
“Your hand…” he trails off. “How does it feel?”
My lips part as I watch the water continue to roll over my skin. But truthfully, I don’t know how it feels because my sensations are warped when he touches me.
I make the mistake of looking at him as he stares up at me with those fucking eyes that could put me into an early grave. He still has a firm grip on my hand, and I know I’m slowly starting to lose control, but I can’t.
He’s not safe with you. Let him go.
Blind fear wracks through me, and I rip my hand from his grip, stunning us both, but I quickly cover my expression. Pain etches through me like ten lightning strikes in a row, and now I’m shaking from the withdrawals.
“Don’t do that again,” I grumble, even though my wolf screams to reach out and take his hand once more to stop the agony.
Evan frowns. “Do wh?—”
“Touch me,” I hiss.
“Caleb, I–”
“Your scent is everywhere,” I grit through my teeth. “In my fucking soul, and it’sdestroyingme.”
Evan’s eyes flick between mine as he releases a ragged breath of disbelief, and I curse to myself for being such an asshole.
“All you had to say was thank you,” he mutters with vacant eyes.
Without another word, he swallows harshly and turns to leave as I sense his heart quivering. My chest feels like it’s gaping open because I’m letting my future walk out the door. I subconsciously reach out for him, not wanting things to be left like this after lashing out. I take his wrist in my good hand, sparks fly through my sternum.
I told him not to touch me, and here I am touchinghim.
Never in my life have I felt this conflicted.
Evan shudders as he looks back at me. “He–” I start before pausing. “He can’t know,” I murmur raggedly, praying he understands.
