“Kind of,” I say. “When we were kids, the daytime parades were always fun and a little bit more family friendly. But as we got older and we started learning about the real parties, we all couldn't wait for that first time we could end up on Bourbon Street.”
“I would’ve totally snuck down there.”
“Oh I did. I was seventeen. By far the most rebellious thing I’ve ever done.”
God it was fun. It was my group of friends from high school, including Shelby and Hannah. Actually, Shelby orchestrated it. Hannah panicked the whole time that we were going to get caught. The guys we went with, including Justin, were drunk from the moment we pulled out of the gas station parking lot we met at. We were young and wild and free. We didn’t know about true hardships. Or loss. Or that the boy you were holding hands and dancing with on Bourbon Street would one day devastate you in ways you didn’t think imaginable.
“Did you get caught?” Maddox asks.
“Yes and no. Our parents knew, but we didn’t get in trouble. Sneaking out for Mardi Gras is a rite of passage. They knew they couldn’t say a thing to us because they did the same thing when they were our age.”
“Do you go back often for it?”
“Not really. I did in college—you know, when we were legally old enough to drink. But after a while, like you said, it kind of lost its luster.”
“When was the last time you went back?”
“Jeez… maybe eight, nine years ago? Justin and I…”
I trail off as I think about that night. We went to visit family and friends. A group of guys we went to high school with were going down for the night, so we tagged along. I ended up getting sick and passing out before nine o'clock. He stumbled in around four in the morning smelling like a perfume that wasn’t mine.
I chalked it up to old friends, crowded bars, and the party that is Mardi Gras.
He’ll never admit it, but I’m convinced that was the first time he cheated.
“Can I ask you a question?” Maddox asks, walking back toward me as I turn off the stand mixer.
“Sure.”
“Why did you stay here?”
“Why did I stay where?”
“Nashville. Your family is in Louisiana. Hannah is there, right? Why did you stay in a city that you lived in because of him?”
I stop what I’m doing and wipe my hands on a towel, assuming the same position as him with my backside against the table. “I know that’s what it seems like on the outside, but that’s only because he had the career first. He was always going to make more money than me once his schooling was over. That doesn’t mean he has more of a claim to us being here.”
We start rolling our cookies, working side by side. I don’t mind sharing this story with him, but not having to look him in the eye will make it so much easier.
“Vanderbilt was actually my idea, Justin came along for the ride.” I scoff as I realize that was the last time he went along with one of my ideas. “I’m sure when I started looking at colleges, I convinced myself coming here was because of the school. That it was the right college to attend for a would-be business woman and a doctor. But in reality, I’d always had a love for Nashville.
“Being a music fan, I adored the idea that any night of the week I could be out and hear someone singing who could one day be accepting a Grammy. I loved that when you got off the plane at the airport there was live music.”
“The guy out front of Tootsies in the airport is really good,” he adds. “Heard him sing Tennessee Whiskey once and I swore it was actually the real singer.”
“Exactly. My parents brought me here when I was eight and I’d been enamored with it ever since.”
I turn to look at Maddox, and to my surprise, he’s also looking at me. Hanging on to every word I say.
“I was going to make this work no matter what. Because in reality, I’m the reason he’s here in the first place. And like hell if I’m going to leave.”
“Fuck yeah,” he says. “Good for you standing your ground.”
“Thanks,” I say as I turn my attention back to the cookies. “Okay, into the oven for nine minutes.”
“Nine minutes?” he asks as he puts the trays in the oven. “Why not ten?”
“Because eight isn’t enough and ten’s too many.”
