Eivor didn’t even ask me to be here. I’m just here. I can’t seem to stay away from him. Even in the shadows, watching at a distance. Watching as he moves closer and closer to this other man.
My pulse quickens as I realize what this might be.
What if he’s meeting him to hook up?
It wouldn’t be odd. It makes sense with everything going on, hell it would make sense even more. He’s a man; he has needs.I didn’t think those needs included other men until the night at the club, but...
So, why do I feel my fists tightening just thinking about Carmine being kissed by this stranger?
I shift, trying to get a better view. My boots make a slight scuff on the ground and I stay completely still as Carmine looks to the side. He looks right in my direction.
For a brief second, I think I’m caught, but then he looks away.
I exhale slowly and move again, until I can see them more from the side. My gloved hands slide on the edge of the water tank with a metallic slink.
There they are. Carmine, bundled up in a black peacoat with a fur lined hood. His neatly combed hair wind blown and hanging over his forehead in stringy pieces that have gotten close. And another man. Tall, broad, with sunglasses on even though it’s nearly dark.
Suddenly, the bigger man grabs Carmine by the front of his shirt and yanks him closer. Carmine grabs his arm.
Instinctively, I reach toward my gun.
Wait.
I’m not supposed to be here.
Still, if Carmine is in trouble, would he blame me for coming out of the shows to save his ass? Perhaps not.
Whether or not Carmine will be upset knowing I’ve been watching him isn’t the real question.
That question is, will Eivor be displeased?
Uncle Eivor would probably prefer that I let Carmine be injured or killed here on this rooftop. He’d be happy for each and every Dresvanni to be taken out so he could take over entirely. Even if his current plan has us protecting them to get into the club.
I don’t want that.
I try to tell myself it’s only because Alessio will never work with me if Carmine is killed, and Alessio is exactly who is next in line to be in charge.
Still, I keep my eyes on them.
Carmine’s voice raises just enough that I hear him say, “You don’t want to?—”
Then the man lets him go, and he adjusts his coat before taking a step back. His eyes narrowed and hot with irritation.
Even as I watch the deal go on without anymore immediate danger, I’m presented with an internal conflict.
If it comes down to it, will I protect Carmine Dresvanni?
Yes. Yes I will.
5
Carmine
Christmas and New Year’s have gone by faster than I anticipated. At the same time, every day feels like ten. Everything is a blur and a bore all at once. All I can do to keep myself sane is to take another shot of whiskey, bourbon, scotch—hell, even vodka—whatever will ease the sharp pain in my chest that I wake up with every single day.
I need to stay alert enough to run the family, the business, so drugs like the ones I took at the club are out of the equation entirely. Though, I have to admit that there’s a large part of me that wants to feel that way again. So completely out of it that I don’t care what’s happening, or who it’s happening with.
The high isn’t quite worth the hangover. Not with whatever the fuck that was that night at the club. When it finally started to wear off, I felt like I was being dragging through the world at a snails pace, and every bone in my body hurt. Every scar I had ever received stung like it was freshly cut. Especially the one on my hand.
