We share a laugh while Carmine scowls, looking slightly unsure of himself standing next to Joey.
“Well, he’s just like that, I suppose.”Peeking a look at the girls coloring, I offer the oohing and aahing where necessary.“Joey, do you want to color?”His nose scrunches up when my eyes land on him.“Or not.Maybe you want to play a game on my phone?”It’s not often I allow them to, but once in a while is okay.
“Not really.”He shrugs and sits next to Emma on the carpet in the den that we’ve managed to take over already.
Releasing a breath, I feel a cramp hit my side from stress and too much activity today.Carmine immediately notices, and he’s beside me, one hand on my waist, observing me.His not asking if I’m okay is telling; he’d rather assess for himself.
“I’m fine, just a minor cramp.It happens, and it’s normal.”
He doesn’t appear to believe it but doesn’t comment further.Instead, he grips my elbow and gently pulls me towards the kitchen.We can still see the kids as they color, so I don’t put up a fight.
“Sit.”He points to a stool at the island counter.
The gold swirls in the marble mesmerize me into forgetting my tension until he comes up behind me and places a bottle of sparkling juice before me.But he doesn’t stop there.His front presses into my back, one hand drops to my hip while the other pushes my hair away from my neck.He leans down and inhales deeply before placing a featherlight kiss on my rapidly beating pulse.
Inhaling sharply, I moan out his name, “Carmine.”God, I remember the way his lips felt on my body.The way I’ve craved them ever since.
“I don’t want you to leave tonight,” he confesses.“But I realize you didn’t plan on a sleepover with the kids.”My heart stutters, loving that he thinks of them.“So you can all spend the weekend with me.”
“I don’t know.”I need to build up some kind of resistance.Carmine is the only man who can break down my walls so easily.
“You do.”His lips travel along my throat until I feel his hot breath in my ear.“I know you thought having kids would scare me off.It doesn’t.I love children, and I think yours have already wiggled their way into my heart.”
Tears prick at the corner of my eyes.He’s saying all the right things, but I’m still unable to let go of the words from the past.“You’re only saying all this because of the baby.”
“You’re right.”He doesn’t pull away, instead wrapping both arms around my middle.“But it doesn’t make them any less true.”Fighting back the insecurity I drown in incessantly, he continues, “I’ve spent every day since our night together regretting how adamant I was that we couldn’t be together, mama.”Sucking on the tendon in my neck, he groans.“Give me time to prove I mean what I say.”
Chewing on the inside of my cheek, I struggle with what I want and what’s best for the kids until Emma comes running in with her picture.“Car, wook, wook!”Carmine drops to his knees.“For you,” she grins, excited for him to see it.
“This is beautiful, little one.”He points out all the things he loves, and she excitedly squeals and chatters on, most of it unintelligible.
“Widge!”She points to the unadorned fridge, wanting him to put it on there.
“You bet!”Picking her up, he hands her the picture and rifles through a drawer to find a magnet.“Where do you want it?”
She hems and haws until she plasters it high up in the middle of one of the doors, where he then affixes it.
“Wove it!”Emma claps and then throws her arms around his neck for a hug, and I find it even harder to resist the man.
It doesn’t even phase him as he carries her around the room, grabbing her a juice box and a bag of Goldfish crackers from the pantry.
“Tank you, Car.”
He sits her on the counter in front of where he stands next to me and opens the bag of Goldfish before handing it back to her.Emma munches quietly in between sips of her juice, happy as a clam in the ocean.
“Two of her favorite things,” I tell him, and the triumphant look in his gaze makes me laugh.The man could charm the venom out of a snake if he wanted.
The hushed tones of Kylie and Joey talking from the other room, while Becky enters the kitchen, are so homey and make me wish I could give this to them.The full family effect.Something they’ve never truly had.
“What are you thinking?”Carmine startles me from my thoughts.“Whatever it is, I can see it’s upsetting you.”
Huffing, I debate what to tell him.“It’s hard sometimes, being the one to do everything, be everything for them.”
“I remember.”The solemn tone softens me.I nearly forgot his girls were young when their mom died as well.“Where is their father?”he asks.
This is the time to explain our dynamics, but I’m not ready, not yet, but I still give him the truth.“In jail, I hope.”That’s how it’s supposed to be.
“Jail.”Carmine says the word slowly, like he’s processing the meaning.“What did he do?”
