The massive bird hopped down, his talons scraping across the wood as he waddled closer. That silver gaze hypnotized me,sucking me into their swirling depths. I reached for him again, certain he’d bloody my hand purposefully this time.
To my utter shock, he ducked under it, placing my fingers in the downy spot on the back of his neck. Stroking there was like stroking a cloud. I’d never felt anything softer.
He clicked softly, a sound I was coming to recognize as his way of communicating contentment. Excitement thrummed in my veins as he ruffled himself and leaned against my shoulder—nearly taller than me with us side by side.
The Issaraeth’s attention seared into me, and I found myself looking away from the auravane and at him. The intensity of his gaze brought pebbles to my skin. Something more than hate drifted in those icy pools. Something that looked a lot like…yearning.
I didn’t like it one bit. Not when the bond whipped into a frenzy, begging me to pull my mate closer. An ache coiled between my ribs, like the magic that tied us together was desperately trying to drag us flush.
“So the Korona can tell the infamous Issaraeth where to find more Elessarum to slaughter?” I aimed my accusing words like a well-timed slap.
“It is myduty.” Yet the way he spit out the final word told me there was a complex web around whatever his sister tasked him with. But I ignored it. Whatever his feelings were, he was still responsible for the deaths or imprisonment of my friends and family.
“Yes, I know who you are, Issaraeth. You break the minds of those who want to live in peace. Who do not wish to see our kith perish needlessly. Why do you think I ran from you, over and over and over again? Too bad my parents didn’t make it out alive.” Tears pricked my eyes at the thought of them. “But I certainly will escape you with my neck still intact.”
Rage flashed across his features and rattled our chain, battling with my acute grief.
“I have a name, you know,” he hissed through clenched teeth.
“I do.” The words were flat, harsh.
“Then why don’t you use it,Sylaira?” His knuckles turned white over his grip on the rear of the wagon.
A long moment passed while I wrestled with my answer. Weighed whether or not I wanted to give it. “Because calling you Issaraeth keeps you a villain. Some abstract figure to loathe. To fear. It is why you prefer that, is it not? So that us Elessarum tremble at the very idea of you. Don’t even attempt to fight back when you arrive on our doorstep. Merely cow to your wishes out of fear of our minds being broken.”
A muscle feathered in his jaw.
“So no, I cannot call you by your given name, lest I forget who you truly are,” I spit, bitterness coating my tongue.
Ilae ducked out from under my hand and hopped back toward his master. He headbutted the Issaraeth’s shoulder, and I couldn’t quite tell whether it was out of comfort or admonishment. Somehow, the latter seemed to radiate from the bird.
My mate didn’t even acknowledge him as he continued to glare at me. “You have no idea who I am, little fugitive. And you’ve made it plenty clear that you never wish to. Bury your head in the sand, as your people have done for centuries, if you wish. I thought most Elessarum were fools, but you have to be the worst of them all.”
With the final insult, he spun on his heel and disappeared from my sight. My nails bit into my palm as Ilae spread his wings and took to the sky again.
Let him walk away. I hoped the emotions he soclearlyhad no idea how to handle shredded him apart from the inside.
I was no fool. I wasn’t stupid either. I knew exactly how theworld worked. I knew exactly who I was—unfortunately—mated to. I knew exactly why the Elessarum believed in peace.
It was him who continued to believe in lies and fantasies.
As I stewed in my anger once again, the cart jolted forward. Stealing a glance toward the front, I found my mate’s shoulder set in a tense, firm line. His posture, per usual, was impeccable.
The sounds of Stadur faded as we rolled down the road to Sivy. The capital of the Angel Realm awaited, tucked deep into the cloud forest. But it wasn’t the gates of Thalvireth Palace I feared. No, it was being trapped behind them with my fated mate. With the cruel monarchs of the realm.
The thought of Seeing again churned bile in my gut. Flashes of past times when I’d awoken in a pool of sweat, with tears streaming down my face, returned. My palms turned cold and clammy. I dug my nails into them, inhaling deeply, and trying to banish the fear that lingered in my bones.
Perhaps I would have felt differently about my gift if I Saw something other than death and destruction.
I hated my power. But I was coming to find that I hated being helpless even more. Especially now, with this severe injury.
Defiance threaded through my core. I could always refuse to tell them what I Saw, so that I wouldn’t stain my hands for their war. But would the Issaraeth Command me to use my power if I resisted? Three times now, he’d used the magic on me, and he seemed to lack all remorse for stripping me of my autonomy.
He wouldn’t care if I was bare and broken. In fact, I think he’d rather enjoy being the one to do it. I tilted my head, taking in the backside of him again. Glared at it for good measure. An undeniable tension crackled between us.
Would we even survive the remainder of our journey?
I honestly couldn’t say.
