“It’s nothing,” I said in a rush.
But he tasted my lie. After all, I hadn’t slammed up a new barricade to keep him out.
“Tell me,” he insisted, shifting off me and propping himself on his elbow.
The intensity of his scrutiny seared me, and I kept my attention firmly on the canopy over his four-poster bed. “What happens now?” Deflecting was easier than trying to unravel the complexity of my feelings. Because I couldn’t tell him beneath the bliss, the worry that I’d be hurt again lingered.
Dread trickled down our bond, despite his neutral expression.
Vaeron blew out a long breath. “You are excused from the morning Seeing session today. But Iaoth will expect you there in the afternoon. We can dine together and then I can walk you back.”
My stomach chose that moment to rumble.
“What else?” I asked, because today’s logistics weren’t what I’d meant when I asked that question.
My mate was silent for a long moment, but his thoughts were a blur. He raked a hand through his mess of iron-gray hair, rubbing the back of his neck. “My sister will tighten her grip now. I would advise keeping to yourself as much as you can.Maelsar, Heraphia, Lyriasthe, me, those are your safe people. Everyone else is there to watch you. To exploit the slightest weakness.”
A chill sank into my bones. Always, always, always I was the coveted object for what I could do for someone else. Never was I wanted for just me.
Except…
Vaeron was still looking at me like he would gladly face the wrath of the most powerful Angels in the realm for me. Like I was the air he needed to breathe. Like I was his salvation.
There was nothing heshouldlike about me. We came from very different backgrounds. Our beliefs weren’t in any way aligned.
But he wanted me.
Because I’m his mate.
The thought whispered from the back of my mind, diminishing the beacon of the idea that he might want me for any other reason.
This bond was really the only chain tying us together. Without it, he would have simply handed me over and been on his way to hunt more Elessarum down.
“None of that is true,” he growled, hand tightening on my waist and dragging me closer to him.
“Listening to my thoughts?” I lifted an accusatory brow.
“It is so rare that you don’t have a wall higher than the one that divides our continent in place,” he murmured, eyes searching mine.
A breath shuddered in my chest. “It’s so difficult not to.”
He flipped me on my side and pressed a kiss to my forehead. “I know, little fugitive. I know.”
A choked sob burst out before I could silence it. Vaeron only held me closer. The heat of his body, the firm, sure way hecradled me…
All of it shattered the thin sheet of glass I’d managed to erect over my feelings.
“You—you killed everyone I love,” I cried, shoulders shaking. “My parents. My friends. You hunted me, made me feel terror like I’d never known. Took me against my will.”
My fingers dug into his side like I could tear into his flesh. He made no move to stop me. Said nothing either.
“But now I’m in your bed, I’m in your arms seeking comfort. How fucked up is that?” I hiccuped. “I was so, so angry that you didn’t tell me about your betrothal. And now that it’s over, I don’t have anything to cling to to hold steadfast in my resolve to loathe you. In fact, I’m terrified of your trial.”
Vaeron rubbed a soothing circle on my back, reminding me far too much of the ring of black decorating the skin between my shoulder blades.
“Now, I have to confront myself. I don’t even know who I am anymore,” I admitted, my voice no more than a whisper.
“Our Radiant Mother has plans for you. For us,” he murmured, pressing his lips to the top of my head. “You may not believe that, but I do.”
