My eyes widen as I gasp, “Not letters. No, you’re piano keys.”
Peace washes over me as I lay my fingers over them, humming in time with the tune. Kane will come back now. He always liked it when I played the piano because he said it was when I was myself. If I’m in front of other people, he doesn’t like it. When I play on my own, he’ll wrap his arms around me and tell me he loves me.
Ifheloves me—someone good that cares about people—maybe I can love me too. Yeah, I only need to keep playing.
The keys disappear under my fingers as my eyes snap open. I tilt my head to the side to watch the picture my bloody fingertips make as I drag the red paint against the stone.
“Kane will come back,” I mumble as my vision blurs. The red edges of my painting fade to brown as it oxidizes. I scrape my fingers against the sharpest edge of the stone as I turn, looking for a better canvas. The bed is pushed against a plastered wall. Perfect. I press my palm flat to the stone, above the jagged piece, then pull it down as fast as I can.
I have endless paint now.
Cupping my hand to collect it, I go to the perfect canvas as I dip two fingers into my paint-filled palm. If I can’t have Kane yet, if my mind refuses to make him into a character, my body can make him. Just until he comes back to watch the stars with me.
40
KANE
Sasha pinches a cube of meat between her thin fingers, holding it out to me. “Hungry?”
“It’s not even cooked.”
Becausethatis my complaint when the menu is human flesh. The fact it’s fucking raw.
Eating human flesh is the least of my sins after months of gaining Rowan’s trust. Even more horrifically, his respect. But I have one piece of humanity left—my wife.
“It tastes better like this.” Sasha shrugs before she throws the cube into her mouth. “You’re too picky.”
I let my head drop back, closing my eyes as the jet hums. The vibrations are soothing, reminding me I’m alive. A little longer, then I’ll have my humanity in my arms. A little longer, and I won’t be stuck with my new assistant who chews with her mouth open.
My foot flies into her shin when the sound of her chomping gets louder. “Close your fucking mouth.”
Sasha rests her boney elbows on the edge of the table and grips the bottom of her new mask, pulling it down to expose her mouth so I can see her chew. The make-up she’s applied to it hassettled into each small pore of the material. I don’t know what it’s made from since she’s neurotic about her masks, but I can see the half-chewed, gristly flesh in her mouth as she pushes her tongue forward like an ill-behaved child.
“Keep doing it. I’ll take your food off you.” My threat makes her emerald eyes widen as she quickly snaps her mouth closed. The chewing isn’t amplified anymore, but I can still hear it. It’s even worse when she gulps. Her eyes narrow beneath the mask as she sheepishly moves her hand to collect another cube of meat from the bag of food Rowan gave her for our trip.
“What are you going to do on the island?” I ask to set the weirdo at ease.
“I’ve never been allowed to go before, so I’ll wait here for you.”
“You’re not going to the house with me?”
She shakes her head, discreetly reaching for another cube. “I’m not allowed.”
“Fuck that, you’re with me. You can come if you want.”
She sighs, rolling her eyes as she stops herself from shoving the meat into her mouth. “You’re going to get me in trouble. I like you now. You taste like berries today.”
The jet begins its descent and I soften my voice. “Will you be okay waiting for me?”
Her lips curve in the distorted lips of her mask, showing her immaturity as she snatches the plastic-lined bag of her treats to hold them up. “I have my food. This—” She pushes back into the seat. “—is comfy. Are you going to miss me?”
“Like a hole in the head, Sasha.”
I close my eyes, accustomed to the routine as I lay my hands on the table. As soon as we’ve landed, cold air floods the cabin, followed by booted footsteps, no doubt belonging to masked guards. They pull a hood over my head, zip-tie my hands, then I’m ready for the final leg of my journey.
“Bye-bye, Kane.” Sasha hums.
I don’t need my sight to know she’ll be waving at me. Her issues surpass her diet. Whenever she’s around the mirrored masks, she’ll become childlike, downplaying her intellect when she’s sharp, quick-witted, and violent.
