“Fair enough. Great game tonight, Carter. Thanks for chatting with us.”
I stop in the tunnel on my way to the locker room and take a deep breath.
This is exactly what we talked about last night. But it definitely feels a little more real now.
I have to appreciate how quickly Miles thought on his feet. He had no way of knowing how the game would go, that I would get a star or be asked to do a post-game interview. That he managed to feed information to Avery—probably while I was accepting my star—is impressive.
I find Miles in the locker room already half out of his gear. I give his shoulder a playful shove as I walk by. “Way to put me on the spot, man.”
He grins. “How did it go?”
I drop onto the bench at my stall, directly across from him. “I’m already regretting the nice things I said about you.”
“Wait, what’s happening?” Fly says. “Is there drama here? What did I miss?”
“No drama,” I say. “Just an annoying post-game question I’m pretty sure Miles put Avery up to asking me.”
“Dude. Is she asking what I think she’s asking?” Theo says from the bench beside me. He has his phone out with the interview already playing. He must have pulled up the live broadcast and tracked backward to find it. He looks up and grins. “Look at Avery getting all personal. That’s not usually her style.”
Fly moves in and looks over Theo’s shoulder. “What did she ask?”
Several other guys take an interest and crowd around Theo’s phone.
I look over at Holly, who is sitting next to Miles and watching me closely. He’s the only person on the team besides Miles and Theo who will know I’m not actually in a relationship with Sarah. Partly because I already told him what Miles asked and partly because even if I hadn’t told him, he’d never believe me dating someone and not talking to him about it.
He lifts his eyebrows and tilts his head up the slightest bit, like he’s asking if I’m okay.
I shrug and give him a nod. If I think too hard about what’s happening, panic definitely threatens to creep in. But I went into this with my eyes open. We already started this ball rolling. I just have to ride the momentum and hope I land on my feet on the other side.
“SoisCarter seeing someone?” Jordo asks. “Is that what she was implying? That he was taking notes on marriage because…he’s gettingmarried?” He sounds completely shocked, and I can’t say that I blame him.
I keep my head down, eyes focused on unlacing my skates. At this point, it’s all about the power of suggestion. If Idon’t say anything, they’ll take my silence as an admission and fill in the blanks for me.
Jordo slaps my back as he moves past. “Dude. Are you holding out on us? What aren’t you telling us?”
“I guess you’ll know when I decide to tell you,” I say.
A chorus of laughs and jeers and jokes erupts around the room, then I’m assaulted with a barrage of questions. Is it someone they know? How long have I been seeing her? Does Miles know? Is that why he tipped off Avery? Has Theo met her? Has Holly?
When Coach Kimzey finally comes in for a post-game debrief, I’m happy for the interruption, but I still find myself struggling to focus on his feedback. My mind keeps drifting to Sarah, wondering if she watched the game from home, if she maybe saw the post-game interview.
It’s an odd feeling to know that my actions, my words—they’re all tied back to her now. Whether I’m ready for it or not.
Once I’m showered and ready, I catch Miles on his way out. “Hey, did Sarah come tonight?” I ask, and something in his expression shifts, taking on a slight wariness that wasn’t there before.
“Nah, man. She didn’t come. She?—”
“Daddy!” Poppy calls, cutting him off. We both turn to see Anna and the girls walking down the hall. Poppy runs and leaps into Miles’s arms.
“Hey, kiddo,” he says. He looks at Anna over Poppy’s shoulder. “I thought you took the girls home.”
Anna shrugs. “Poppy really wanted to wait and see you.”
Poppy takes Miles’s face into her hands and squishes his cheeks. “Good job on getting a star, Daddy.” She looks over at me. “You too, Carter.”
“Thanks, Poppy,” I say. Standing here, watching Miles with his family, the loneliness I felt at the end of the game sharpens, the chasm inside my chest growing wider and wider.
Olive reaches for her dad next, and soon, he’s so immersed in his family that he doesn’t seem at all concerned with finishing our conversation.
