“Why would that be funny?” My voice is ice, making him sit up straight and cough into his fist.
“It’s not. I just can’t believe this.”
“Hold your horses, let’s figure this out,” Cole says as he pats Pauly’s shoulder. He turns to face me and leans in as he whispers, “Is it yours?”
I know we agreed not to share it with others just yet, but I know she’s told her two friends and I trust these guys with my life, even if they drive me insane.
“Yes, but you can’t say a word. No one knows, not even Ian,” I whisper-hiss, trying to keep my voice down.
Both Pauly and Cole remain silent for a beat, processing, and then, pandemonium. Suddenly, they’re out of their high-top seats and crushing me in a hug as they congratulate me.
“Okay, that’s enough. I don’t want to make a scene,” I tell them as I shove them away, despite the smile on my face. Because it feels good to tell people, to have the people I’m close to be excited for me.
“Wow, you’re going to be a dad. That’s so cool.” Pauly lowers his voice, leaning his chest across the table as he speaks.
“Yeah, I am,” I reply, thinking about how I thought I had this once and how it crushed me when I found out that it wasn’t real.
This isn’t like that, but sometimes I lie awake at night, worrying that something will take this away from me.
“So what’s the deal between you two?” Cole asks.
“We’re co-parenting. She’s actually living with me right now because her place burned down.”
Cole folds his lips together, then says, “Man, are you not worried she’s trying to trap you?”
I glare at him, and it must be lethal enough because he leans back in his seat as he throws his hands up in defense.
“No, I’m not. She can easily afford her own place. It’s just easier right now as she transitions into motherhood. I can help the first few months until she gets her footing, and then we’ll set up a schedule for who has the baby and when.” I do my best to explain without telling them that she has no family to help besides Ian.
When Camille had Olivia, Ryker’s mom stayed at their place for a month until they got their bearings.
We don’t have that. I’m sure Camille would offer, but she has her own family to care for right now.
“And you don’t want to be with her, romantically?” Pauly asks, keeping his voice low enough that no one near us could hear a thing.
My instinctive response is to say that we’re platonic, because that’s what I say to Teagan all the time. And yet, the words don’t come.
Because I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have feelings for her. It started out as agreeing to be just friends and caring for the mother of my child, but between the cozy evenings we’ve settled into since she moved in, getting to know her behind the facade she puts on, I’ve fallen for her.
“We can’t be,” is what I go with, though, because it’s the truth. “Blueberry is our number one priority, and if we try to date and it goes to shit, it could ruin any chance we have at providing a healthy parenting relationship.”
“Blueberry?” Pauly and Cole both repeat.
A small chuckle slips between my lips. “Yeah, it’s what she calls the baby.”
They both smile softly at that, then Pauly says, “Well, I’m happy for you, Q. We’re going to be here for anything you need, okay?”
“What he said,” Cole says as he tosses a thumb toward Pauly.
“Thanks, guys, I appreciate you two.”
They nod along before tipping their beers back and taking a drink. I take a sip of my soda, wanting to be completely sober and alert.
My eyes track behind Pauly’s head to Teagan, who’s standing in line at the bar, with no Ian in sight.
It’s probably not the best idea to go near her, considering Ian can appear at any time, but there’s no harm in me getting a drink at the same time she is, right?
I’m out of my seat, making my way toward the group of people waiting for drinks at the bar, shoving my way through people until I get to her.
