“Wow.” Teagan marvels, a hand flying to her mouth.
My knees go weak, forcing me to lower myself into the chair beside Teagan as my eyes mist with tears. There are tears pooling in her eyes as well and my fingers flex toward hers, wanting to wrap her hand in mine, but I refrain after the conversation we had when I picked her up.
She wants to keep this uncomplicated for the baby, and I want to respect it. Which means no unnecessary touching. Yet everything in my body screams that itisabsolutely necessary to touch her right now. To have that connection with her, to express how happy I am that we’re doing this together.
Still, I restrain myself and focus on the screen, watching as the doctor takes images of different angles and records measurements.
“Are you okay?” Teagan’s soft voice draws my attention to her, and I swallow with a nod.
“Yeah, it’s just a lot to see for the first time,” I croak, then clear my throat. “In a good way,” I add, not wanting her to think any differently.
Her brown eyes are glassy and she blinks rapidly to keep the tears from falling. “I know what you mean.”
I’ve never seen her like this, and simply seeing the tears in her eyes is killing me. It makes me want to cradle her into me and hold her where I know both she and the baby will be safe.
Dr. Caruso goes over a few details regarding the pregnancy from what to expect as she transitions into her second trimester and things to look out for.
“Is there anything I can do to help as she goes through the pregnancy?” I ask once she’s done cleaning off the gel from Teagan’s belly.
“The advice I give to all dads is to just be there for her,” she replies, then adds, “Oh, and to give Mom whatever she wants. It makes everyone happier.”
We all laugh at that, and then she reminds us to book an appointment in two weeks once Teagan’s officially in her second trimester.
“Thank you so much,” Teagan says with a smile on her face, but I can tell something’s bothering her.
Once Dr. Caruso is out of the room and the door closes behind her, I turn to face Teagan.
“What’s going on?” I ask her gently.
“Seeing Blueberry makes me emotional, that’s all. It’s…exciting and terrifying. I didn’t think this was going to be my life, you know?”
I give her a soft smile and sigh. “I’ve realized that’s usually how life tends to go. The way we don’t expect.”
Teagan’s mouth opens like she’s going to say something, then pauses, closing her mouth instead. I desperately want to push and pry, to figure out what’s going on inside her head, but I don’t want to overwhelm her more than she already seems to be by forcing her to confide in me before she’s ready.
Instead, I do the second-best thing I know how to do and cover her hand with mine, giving it a gentle squeeze.
My skin instantly jolts at the contact and Teagan inhales sharply. Our gazes meet and the air around us shifts into something that feels familiar, yet unknown at the same time.
Time feels frozen for a moment as I look into her brown eyes when a knock on the room next to ours snaps the thread that was connecting us.
Tegan pulls her hand from under mine and says, “We should get going.”
“Right,” I agree, already feeling the absence of her skin against mine.
I help her down the examination table, and I wait for her to look at me, but she keeps her gaze averted even when we make it to my car.
“Did I do something wrong?” I ask once we begin our drive back to ESA.
“No, not at all. It was just me, not you. Sorry for being difficult to deal with. I don’t make things easy,” she says apologetically.
“You have nothing to apologize for. My sister was a troublemaker growing up, so I’m used to being challenged. Besides, I’m confident I can handle you.”
“Platonically, of course,” she reminds me.
“Of course,” I repeat her words, laughing as I do.
“Are you guys close?” she comments, changing the subject as I pull onto the road.
