A hand reached over and placed something on my desk.Keaton’s hand.I looked up from the thoughts I had been lost in.
A coffee.He’d made me a coffee.
“I saw you finished your last one about twenty minutes ago,” he said.He was still standing in front of my desk.He must have bought a new suit over the weekend.This one actually fitted him.I wanted to take it off him.“I thought you would be about ready for another cup.”
“I was,” I said.There was more wonder in my voice than I had intended.Keaton gave me a shy but satisfied smile and pushed his glasses up his nose.He turned back to the filing.
I could see even from just a single glance that he was remaking the system.Making it more efficient.That was what he did.What he had done to everything in this office since starting.
I felt my heart drop.He had been here for only a few weeks and he was already making this place better.Makingmebetter.Anticipating my needs.
Was I falling for my secretary?
No.I knew the answer to that in my heart immediately.
It was too late.
I had fallen for him days ago.
All the rest was just icing on the cake.
I cleared my throat.
“Has your ex been bothering you?”I asked.
Keaton looked confused for a moment.He paused with his hand hovering over the next file.“You mean Jordan?”
Jordan Muriel.I nodded lightly and tried not to let it show on my face that I had looked into the slimeball extensively.“He was bothering you the other day.”
“Oh, yeah.”Keaton looked back at the files.“Honestly, I have him on mute.It’s my own fault when I go and read his messages.I should probably block him once and for all.”
Was there still something there?“Why don’t you?”
Keaton waited a long moment and then shrugged.“I guess I like having the option to read his messages if I want to.Feels kind of good to have someone fighting for my attention, even if I don’t really want it.”
I could understand that on some level.The thought of someone out there wanting your attention.
What I couldn’t understand was wanting it from someone you didn’t want to be with anymore.
“Are you thinking about getting back together with him?”I asked.
It probably wasn’t my business.I was his boss and that was all.But… I had to know.
“No,” Keaton laughed.A wave of relief went over me like a wave.“Three years is a lot to throw away, but I know it’s the right choice.We just… don’t work.Not really.”
“Why not?”I asked.I couldn’t help myself.This wasn’t supposed to be an interrogation.I just needed to know.
What had Jordan Muriel done wrong?How had he lost Keaton?What could he have done to save their relationship?
“Like I said, he’s not out,” Keaton said.He folded his arms while he thought and looked up at the ceiling.He didn’t say anything about this being odd.Maybe he didn’t think it was.Maybe this was just two co-workers talking.I wasn’t exactly experienced in that kind of office chatter.“I just couldn’t handle that, in the end.And even if he changes his mind and decides to come out now… it wouldn’t be enough.I spent three years feeling like I wasn’t good enough for him, like he was ashamed of me, and he let me.He just sat by my side and let me feel like that.That isn’t love.I couldn’t ever be with him again and really feel like he valued me as a person after that.”
“Even if he apologized and came out in front of everyone?”I asked.
“Not even if he did it on the national news,” Keaton said with a wry smile.“I need to respect myself.That’s what Clara says – my little sister.”
I nodded.Something stirred in my memory.“The one who’s dating Fernando.”
Keaton looked at me in surprise.“You remembered.”
