“Yeah,” Olly shrugged. “But there’s also a small gym at the pool for the swimmers to use. And we have the main campus gym for everyone else. Do you want to see what I do to get ready?”
“Yeah,” I said, surprised. I hadn’t asked him to do anything else but show me around for the camera. This was a new idea of his own that he was bringing to the table.
“Okay,” he said. He opened his locker and pulled out his bag. “So, this is all my stuff.”
“That’s your helmet, there, right?” I prompted.
“Oh, yeah. That’s really important to avoid injuries,” he said. “So is a lot of this stuff. And some of the material is tight so we can move and run better.”
I nodded encouragingly. He turned without warning and swept his shirt off his back, dumping it onto the bench that ran down the middle of the rows of lockers. I blinked, doing my best to keep the camera steady. It wasn’t as though I hadn’t seen Olly shirtless before – he slept that way every night.
It just wasn’t often that he deliberately invited me to watch.
I took in his abs, which already seemed more defined than they had the first night when we moved in together, and his rippling biceps. I was certain he was getting wider and more built. I had no complaints whatsoever – campus life was clearly agreeing with him. I had to lick my lips and then look down at the floor for a minute to try not to embarrass myself by getting hard in the locker room.
“This is my jersey,” he said, putting it on and turning around, removing the temptation fully. He pointed at the name and number on his back. “Harvey, number fourteen.”
The door behind us clattered open and I flinched. I had been so focused on Olly, I had forgotten that we were in a place where other people could come in at any time. That coupled with the fact I had been harboring a secret attraction to him just a moment ago…
I found myself struggling to breathe as a group of players came into the room behind us, talking loudly and slamming their locker doors open with metallic clangs.
I couldn’t be here anymore.
“I have to go,” I manage to blurt out, turning and making for the exit as quickly as I could. The room seemed to blur. I was going so fast I couldn’t even make out the faces of the guys who had come in, but I knew they were watching me – they had to be watching me – following me –
I burst out of the locker room and ran down the hall, not stopping until I found a door to the outside where I could get out into the open air. I stopped then, looking up to see a bunch of other students looking up to stare at me as I burst outside. I probably looked half-crazy.
I gasped for breath, leaning against the wall for support. That had come over me so fast. I barely knew what was going on.
“Keaton?”
I turned around and looked up into Olly’s face. It was lined with concern. I must have made him worry by running away like that. He reached for me and I flinched back, and his hand immediately dropped to his side.
“Sorry,” I said automatically. My breath was still coming too fast and my hands were shaking. “Sorry, I…”
Something in Olly’s stance changed. I couldn’t see his face because I was looking at the floor, but it felt like his body kind of slumped. “It’s because of the locker room fight, isn’t it?”
I looked up at him. That had broken me out of things a little, at least. “You call it a fight?” I demanded angrily.
He swallowed. “Sorry. I didn’t know what the right term would be.”
“Beating,” I said. “It was a beating. Or an attack.” I breathed, taking my hand off the wall. I was relieved to find I could stand on my own two feet properly now. The shaking was beginning to go down.
I reached up and touched my ribs on the left side, right under my heart. Where the broken ribs had been. For a moment there it was like I could still feel the pain of them.
“Sorry,” Olly said again. “Maybe we shouldn’t do any more locker room stuff.”
I nodded. “That was probably enough for the documentary,” I said, turning to go.
“Wait – where are you going?” Olly asked.
I glanced back at him. “I have class,” I called over my shoulder.
“Oh. Okay,” he said. When I was a few steps further on, he shouted: “See you tonight!”
I lifted a hand without looking back at him.
It was a lie. I didn’t have class at all.
