“I’m not sure, but it was nice. Not to be alone,” I stumble through, but they nod. And I’m grateful when they don’t push further.
The conversation shifts. Ada mentions Owen’s birthday, then frowns. “IfI can even afford a party this year. My ex is being difficult.”
“Still?” Hannah asks, but Ada waves it off with a tight smile.
Natalie, reading the room, launches into a story about her last travel-nurse assignment. Then Hannah mentions cake tastings for the wedding. I react in the right places, laugh whenI’m supposed to, but I feel half a step removed from everything. Like I’m watching through a glass pane.
When I glance at Mia, she’s studying me.
“Shoot, the game’s starting.” Hannah grabs her glass and heads for the living room.
I go to follow, but Mia intercepts me. “Can you help me grab more wine?”
I follow her into the large pantry off the kitchen.
The second we’re alone, Mia turns to me. “What happened today? And don’t you dare say nothing. I can tell something’s up with you.”
I set my glass down and lean against the shelves. “I think I’m in trouble.”
Her brow furrows. “What kind of trouble?”
“TheI like my roommatekind.”
Her expression shifts, but it’s not surprised. “You have feelings for him.”
It’s not a question.
“I—” The lie dies on my tongue. “Yeah. I do.”
“I can’t say I didn’t see this coming.” She sips her wine. “So, what’s the problem exactly?”
“We’reroommates.” I draw out the word, like it explains everything.
“So? It’s clear he’s into you. The number of times he checked his phone on Christmas…” She shakes her head. “Plus, Dom says Miles has been glued to his phone on the road. Boy’s down bad.”
My heart does a little flip before reality comes crashing back in. “Ignoring the fact that I’m only here for five more months… we live together. We agreed to be friends. If it goes wrong, it’d be messy. And I’ll have to find a new place?—”
“You could always stay with us,” Mia cuts in. “What are we, chopped liver?”
I blink. “You’re actually endorsing this? I gotta say, I didn’t see that coming. With your initial warning and all.”
She shrugs. “It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve been wrong. And how fast he left when you said you couldn’t make it on Christmas? It was kinda sweet.”
“You calling something sweet?” I huff. “Has this wine already gone to my head?”
“Quit deflecting. So you what—just realized this all today?”
“Not exactly. Boone inadvertently called it out.” I pause. “What if I’m not ready? What if focusing on him means I mess up the album? What if?—”
“What if you’re allowed to haveboth?” Mia cuts in. “What if you don’t have to choose between your dreams and Miles?”
I’ve spent so long believing I had to pick one or the other. Music or relationships. Success or love. Having both was never an option. Or, at least, I never let it be one. Like Boone so helpfully pointed out this morning.
I’ve seen what happens when women try to have it all. Half the women I knew in Nashville were more talented than me, but they’re still singing in dive bars because love kept them rooted.
And I won’t be one of them.
Mia’s quiet. Then: “So what are you going to do?”
